Dites-moi, pourquoi la vie est belle...

Yet another engagement news

2012-01-31T07:53:00.003+08:00

I guess I am of age where everyone already are starting to get hitched so fast that I cant keep up!

So today, I just got news from the lovely German couple - my dive buddies, are now engaged.

I can't help but look at myself.....in disgust.

I feel like saying to myself - WHAT E **** IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

Why is everyone getting hitched but not yourself?

Yesterday, he smoked again.

He was nice enough to brush his teeth immediately after. Wash his hand. And rinse his mouth with mouth rinse.

But you know, non-smokers can ALWAYS smell smoke - just because we are more sensitive to that smell. There is no running away!

So that disgusted me.

Why must he be a smoker? Heavens- are you playing a joke on me?!?

Then.... at my moment of weakness...I thought about my plan "B"..... I dont feel that I am deserving. Until I was sure that he is actually my plan A.

This is not a good side of me. :(

I was watching the movie - "Into the wild" yesterday, and I thought to myself- I need and want to be more honest. Face my ugly thoughts, and I can tackle them and cleanse myself off them!

Dragon year!

2012-01-27T13:05:00.002+08:00

Mummy was informing me on CNY's eve that the Dragon year is going to be a great year for me - according to my Chinese zodiac sign. But I had no idea that it is going to be so good! ;-)

CNY eve - I was quite depressed - it has got to do with something about not being able to find the love that I so desire and need. Sissy gave me a hug- and I was reminded of how lucky I am - with my family :)

The same night, I was texting with PL - and I felt much better.

Day 1 of CNY, Cw came over and we had a great time writing in Daffy's autograph book (something that I should have done like 14+ years ago!). It is really nice to have friends that will always be there, and these ones that I grew up with.

Day 2 of CNY, met MK - who gave me an Angbao(!!). Cheap thrill, but this is only my 2nd angbao of the year! Had a great time with daffy + cw + ed. I was really lucky to have ed as my friend - he actually drove me down and removed my stitches for me on the spot - how cool is that?!?!!? Went to the hospi to see GM. J picked me up for drinks. :)

Life is good. :)

Day 3: I freaking got upgraded by oneworld to their fabulous A380 business class for an 8 hour flight for free! WOW! How did that happen!! I have been a loyal member of Staralliance, definitely not oneworld. So looks like I need to change!

Although the service was far superior with SIA, but Qantas gave FREE pyjamas!! ha. That was quite cool!

Day 4: Went for Australia Day's fireworks at Darling Harbour - super nice!

Day 5: The sale of my property is completed! :))))))

So today is day 5 - and EVERY SINGLE DAY - there is something to be happy and celebrate about!

What a turn of events, as I was really so depressed on CNY's eve.

I am SOOOOO LOVIN' this year of the Dragon! :))))))

HUGS AND KISSES TO ALL!!

Thoughts

2012-01-22T14:17:00.004+08:00

Today, I woke up depressed because of the state of my love life.

I was doing spring cleaning in my room.

I came across some old sentimental things I had with my ex-boyfriends...

There was this notepad from 2000, we did not even have real phones then. And my then-boyfriend was in the army.

So what we did was to write a message to each other every night... and then when we meet each other in the weekends, we would exchange our notepads. So that each of us have something to read each day when he is back in the army camp.

Ah.... that was bliss...

Pure innocent love.

I want to find that back.

And I am trying....

But I can't seem to find it back :'(

....

This is getting depressing..

Oh well, on the sunny side, I found my long lost tiffany's charm bracelet! :)

WTH was I doing?

2012-01-15T12:08:00.002+08:00

Your bank statements is like a diary of your financial story.

Today I looked back - and tried very hard to remember - what did I do??!!?

All that was in my mind ..... was WTH was I doing?!?!

Ha.

Hoping that I can eliminate one of my bank accounts soonest...

And keep everything neat and tidy :)

Morrie thoughts

2012-01-14T16:49:00.003+08:00

Note: I have started writing this some time back - just never got to finish it till now. I honestly tore through this book in less than 24 hours.

*******************************************************************

With my recent encounters and experiences... I have quite a lot in my mind..

While packing LS's stuff yesterday, I came across this book - Tuesdays with Morrie. I started flipping through it casually - not intending to read it - but the book captured me so much - I devoured it and finished it this morning.

Here are my after thoughts:
- "Love each other or perish": this is what Morrie lived by. This is one thing I wish to add and add more in my life. I want to add more dosages of love to the world. :)

- "Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too - even when you're in the dark. Even when you're falling."
I experienced this quite literally during Christmas period and I did my very first night dive in the great barrier reef. We had to navigate - me and my buddy, in the dark waters - without being able to see anything, guided by my compass and my buddy.

I think - this is the mentality we should be adopting towards love.

Cause - after all - if you don't trust, it's not love.

- 'What if today were my last day on earth?'

"Mitch," he said, "the culture doesn't encourage you to think about such things until you're about to die. We're so wrapped up with egotistical thungs, career, family, having enough money, meeting the mortgage, getting a new car, fixing the radiator when it breaks - we're involved in trillions of little acts just to keep going. So we don't get into the habit of standing back and looking at our lives and saying, Is this all? Is this all I want? Is something missing?"

I need to remind myself to give thoughts to this. I need to set time aside for this - I do not wish to be caught up in the race and forget about this.

And also after reading Morrie's dying experience.. It was hard to put down this book partly because of how Morrie reminds me of ls.. Ls lived his life to the fullest, he was always full of love and generosity. Ls is the Morrie of my heart. And I can relate to Mitch's experience of interacting with Morrie - and little details that I
notice of ls.. Oh well..

I have always thought that I wanted a painless quick death. I did not want suffering.

But now, I think I would prefer to have time to die or to prep myself for dying. I want a chance to say a proper goodbye.

I want to have a pre-funeral funeral.

Ok. Enough of the funeral thoughts.

- "Once you learn how to live, you learn how to die"

- "Wherever I went in my life, I met people wanting to gobble up something new. Gobble up a new car. ....

You know how I always interpreted that? These were people so hungry for love that they were accepting substitutes. They were embracing material things and expecting a sort of hug back. But it never works.
You can't substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship.

Money is not a substitute for tenderness, and power is not a substitute for tenderness.

- "finding a meaningful life.....Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."

-"Mitch, if you're trying to show off for people at the top, forget it. They will look down at you anyhow. And if you're trying to show off for people at the bottom, forgetit. They will envy you. Status will get you nowhere. Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between everyone."

- "There are a few rules I know to be true about love and marriage: If you don't respect the other person, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don't know how to compromise, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. If you can't talk openly about what goes on between you, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don't have a common set of values in life, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. Your values must be alike.

'And the biggest one of those values, Mitch?'

'Your belief in the importance of your marriage."

- "In the beginning of life, when we are infants, we need others to survive, right? And at the end of life, when you get like me, you need others to survive, right?

....But here's the secret: in between, we need others as well."

- "..he wanted to die with serenity....
'Don't let go too soon, but don't hang on too long.'"

- "Be compassionate.... And take responsibility for each other. If we only learned those lessons, this world would be so much better a place."

2012 planning

2011-12-30T12:03:00.004+08:00

This morning. I received the devastating news... our dearest nearest charlie has left us.

I booked my ticket to fly back tomorrow.

Meanwhile... I found it hard to do anything else. I know I am supposed to be working. And so I will work tomorrow in the plane instead.

To occupy my time. I cooked. Finished cooking, so now... I guess I should plan for 2012.

What do I want for 2012?

1. Finances
Finances is splitted into 2 parts:
- Future planning
I was calculating and strategizing. I think the most comfortable way is to:
*Q1: Place amount in FD - until finding a ideal 2nd prop
*Q2/Q3: Find the ideal prop for investment
*Q4: Increase rent to 6K or beyond for BN.
- Past remedies
*Continue to exit position for VM: 2 more left! Plus mechanical ones
*Get back $$ from MFglobal! Argh - though nothing much can be done here, except to place pressure. hmpf

2. Health
Be more healthy!!! Eating + exercising!

3. Family + Friends
Same principle as before. Important parts of my life, they are.

4. Love
Oh well, since I am already a ripe old age. So relax! It is even worse if you make a mistake right now u know?!?! *talking to self!*

5. Career
Striving to do my best is my current role. While planning to be the best candidate for the next one - but I still have time!
*Side note to self - is to get my kindle fixed! argh!

6. Personal dev
Well - not really a personal dev point. But I REALLY REALLY need to pack! It is in dire state now. but yes step by step and I will get through it!

Voila.

Think these are all very achieveable - *pats self on the back!* ;)

Recapping my year

2011-12-28T12:41:00.005+08:00

For 2011, I realized that I did not blog as much as I did. I guess instead of blogging, I now indulge in FB-ing.

Well.. What did I do this year..hmm..

To start off:
- Countries/Cities that I stomped, keeping in mind that 2011 was a 101% nomadic life:
**Places in Bold are new discoveries for the year. Some of the places I am there a couple of times this year - but did not bother to repeat ;-)

* Started my year off at the freezing Zhoushan
* Shanghai
* Chicago
* Phoenix
* Bali
* Surabaya
* Seoul
* Tianjin
* Beijing
* Shenzhen
* Qingdao
* Bangkok
* Xiamen
* Jakarta
* Gold Coast
* Hongkong
* New Delhi/Gurgaon
* Hyderabad
* Osaka
* Fuzhou
* Hefei
* Lombok
* Massachusetts/Boston
* Maine
* New Hamsphire
* Newbury Port
* New York

* New Jersey
* Kanachanaburi
* Pattaya
* Taipei
* Hualien
* Sydney
* Port Douglas
* Cairns
* Great Barrier Reef

Impactful places - I must say: India, Great Barrier Reef, Taipei. Especially India - it was an eye opener and culinary heaven!

- For the very first time, I was actually able to cast my vote. And so, was really into the General Elections.

- I came up with my finance action plan - and like how I am and how I do things. I take action! I educated myself on stocks trading and CFDs - in a more formal fashion. Also found out about commodities.

Was doing ok with trading and tracking my progresses. AND unfortunately.... the company that I was using went bankrupt!

I was lost. Still at this very moment trying to claim my $$ back.

The target seems to be next Feb 2012. :'(

Why all these drama, heavens?

- Someone got me a Loewe Amazona bag for V-day. Oh well.

- Paid the price. I will never make the same mistake again! I've gotten rid of the toxic in my life.

- Decided that I need to start on a different chapter of my life in the love department.

- Participated in the Presidential Elections! Never thought that this was possible.

- Started clearing the VM bagguage seriously again. As we had to move out of grandpa's place....

- In Sept, I seem to be starting to get a hold of my life again! All steps are significant steps for little me ;-)

- I invested in my very first commercial property, and hence increased my passive income number ;-)

- I also managed to sell off my very first property at a good price too! God bless! :)

- My big milestone birthday came and left calmly. I had a great time in NYC with Roshie - shopping our hearts out.

- Not sure if this is something that I should remember...However, this made me aware that I need my other half to be ultra supportive, as I am not an easy partner. God bless whoever is willing to take up the challenge ;-)

- I disassociated myself with something I should have done since a long time ago, but just did not gotten to doing it. Talk about major procrasination.

In all, all happy that I did it! Thank god for forcing me this way :)

It was stressful, heavy, but all well worth it!

- In December, I actually managed to tick off TWO life goals!!
* One: Went for a LIVE recording of Wo cai - and chatted with Wu Zhongxian! Check it out man! ;-)

* Two: Dove in Great Barrier Reef - It was my birthday gift, kindly sponsor by someone sweet ;-)

- Proved that I can be a domestic goddess - by baking my very own first carrot cake all on my own!

As to how would I be ending the year... I am also anxious to find out myself.

Will it be a sad ending... or a happily ever after?

I pray for the best...

And as the post below...

Que sera sera... If you need to force it, it is not love.

*********************************************************************

Ok - and of course, the goal-obssessed me would like to see how I've performed against my 2011 goals! Updated progress in italics + Bold.

Finances
- sell off the rest of VM: well, believe me, I am working very very hard on this! Almost all my weekend is burnt. Or all my spare time on this! Got some results though! ;-) 2 Mech and 2 Comp sold! :))) but more to go. Please god bless me on this!! Yes this is really my main focus now!
Sold more VMs already. I have only 4 left, 2 to be sold by the end of this week! And about 5 more mechs to go ;-) If there were a grade, I grade myself a B+. :)
- gotten a raise.. Nothing further to be done here. heh.
Ok, gotten another raise and a different job responsibility. So Grade: A ;-) (You can tell that I am enjoying this!)
- got some ideas to explore
Decided not to act for now
- got loan approved for my next property - which I will want to take my own sweet time to look=> But now I am not going to pursue this. After speaking to a very savvy property person (well, he own hotels and other big sized properties, am so grateful to have my good network of friends! :)))), NZ properties dont seem to be a good idea.. hmmm
Invested in my first commercial property - and sold my current property at a great price!
- my own hotel - in progress! Looking forward to next expedition. To be honest - not very sure about this!
Decided not to act for now

Ok, I started on my semi-pro (*COUGH****) stocks trading activities. First 2 trades ended in a cut loss situation, and current 2 positions in green ;-) ALL with the return of the longines! :)))

As for trading - I will need to wait till my funds get back in Feb. Minor hiccup - due to bankruptcy of the trading house. Boo!

Health
- Play more tennis: sadly havent done so, BUT found tennis buddies! Isnt this a progress already? ;-) Started playing tennis - but with all of my buddies and myself travelling so much, I've only played once.. :'( But more to come!
- Pick up golf!! finished 5 lessons - my coach said my swing is pretty solid, but needs practice ;-) I must say - I really REALLY enjoy the game! I found myself tuning into golf champanionship on TV, while working - which in the past, I would never EVER imagine I might be entertained by this! Shocking! Got my golf done and in my poche ;-) LOVE IT! need to practise more though
- Swim more often! And on a regular basis. I will be bringing my swim wear along when I travel. Not doing it often yet but I did swim in Bali - This I will do. Still trying too!! Not very successful. Swam once this week though
I am starting to watch my diet recently. Have to. :'(

Oh diet watching has been successful. Am sure I've lost some weight :))

Overall, I still need more exercising. And be healthier. I was! Until the Dec Taipei trip... oh well. I guess I get a B-.

Love

What love? Still trying to find my way around... Made a terrible mistake, will never do it again!

Am in midst of my crazy plunge. Will update on 31 Dec. It might be a complete failure or a great successful. Anticipation is killing me!

Family
So far so good! Want to try to tempt some family members to join me for my trips... hmmm. Sadly they are not easily tricked ;-)
A-OK

Mum + sissy FINALLY came on a trip with me! So far so good ;-)

Friends

Need to reconnect with some of my good friends that were distanced because of my travelling and being away..

Oh well, I am still super close with the ones I am close with since.. more than 12 years ago - so I think I am good. Just my uni friends.. sigh.

Sama sama. Too busy fixing my finances!

Sama sama

Pampering myself

So far - I got a Loewe and a Fendi Spy,so I am happy! I dont think I quite deserve the other bags yet.

So all in all, I think I did ok.

I need to JIAYOU for 2012!! :)

Do you deserve that man?

2011-12-28T09:33:00.003+08:00

I was scrolling through my reflection posts. And this post made me ponder a little more:http://peihanblogs.blogspot.com/2011/04/do-you-deserve-that-bag.html

Recently... I am quite bothered...

He is a great guy. In so many aspects.

But he smokes.

Now, maybe smoking is socially acceptable in many cultures. And I am totally fine with friends who smoke.

However, having a partner who smokes... is really too close to home.

Questions run through my head.

He agreed earlier - to stop smoking entirely, but now he is regretting his words.

This makes me really nervous.

Is he someone who breaks promises?

Is smoking really so important... more important than me?

How to compromise? Where should the line be drawn?

And then looking back at me... I dont think I am perfect neither.

Sigh.

And I wonder if my story will be as beautiful as this one here: http://timothytiah.com/2011/12/26/how-our-meme-proposal-video-came-about/

Que sera sera..

Plane time

2011-12-13T20:51:00.002+08:00

Each time in the plane – I get into this reflective mode.

I just had so much fun last weekend – I have not had such a great time since a looong long time.

I was struggling, struggling… and struggling…

I was in a hole and I am trying to climb out of it.

I feel that I have a few steps left to go…
I have left some milestones:
- To sell VMx1@B1
- To sell CC VMx1
- To sell RMCC VMx2

How to get there?
- To sell CC VMx1 to YAMI or sell VMx1@B1
- To sell RMCC VMx2
So actually, it seems pretty ok.
Action plan:
- Follow up with Eugene – give spare parts to MS
- Follow up with YAMI
The Gods are really looking out for me – and has specially planned for it. So the stars and all the other signs are lining up.
Fingers are crossed.
I will get through it!! It is so so close!
AOB:
- Invoice to LB
- Sales figures to CC
I almost forgot all the things I need to do! Gosh!

Ok HUGS everyone! This year is indeed – an incredible year! ;-)

Marriages and all

2011-12-03T17:12:00.003+08:00

I worked with a team where all are happily married this week.

I used to think that I am not the marrying kind - after so many failed relationships!

Until my current squeeze convinced me that I am - and how silly of me to believe him! :(

Now all I can see is everyone getting married/having babies/engaged. And it is driving me freaking crazy because I am nowhere near!

I thought he's the one... and I was happy.

But now.. I am not sure.

I cant wait to the end of this year - to find the answer.

At the same time, I wish I could revert to my previous mentality of not getting married. ARGH.

Anyway - I need to sort out my thoughts again. So nothing more perfect to do so, other than today :)

Feelings

2011-11-29T17:32:00.003+08:00

My feelings for you before last week was like a limitless fountain, overflowing and yet continuously refilling up...boundless...

And now... My feelings are like sand in my hand.. I can feel it slipping away slowly through in between my fingers.. The tighter I grasp, the more I try to hold onto it... The faster it slips away...

I can't help but look sadly at the love slipping away...

And my heart is filled now again with emptiness...

---from the biggest loser in love. :(

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Lost

2011-11-27T21:03:00.002+08:00

I thought my compass was pointing towards the right direction.

I thought my safety net was firm and sturdy.

But it is not.

And the direction becomes murky again....

And I am sad...

Struggles

2011-11-25T08:33:00.003+08:00

I realized - what I have been writing - are all about my struggles.

I cant help it!

I had so many different challenges/struggles... all these years. eversince..that day.

I looked back, and reflected on my struggles. Some are not worth it, some are. At the end, what is really important is the lesson learnt.

There are some things that I really wish to hold. But I need to learn to let go - and realize that I am not superwoman, and cant do everything!

Anyway, I will and need to push myself hard - and even harder this weekend.

Need to get things done and cleared before my long trip to Taipei - it is going to be interesting there. I foresee 2 sessions being challenging and 1 easy - I hope!!

Nevertheless - looking forward to Taipei! My taiwanese friends are the BEST! I already have tickets to my mostest favouritest show - okok, it is really stupid, I know - but the show is Wo cai. I think I promised myself back in uni that I will go to a wo cai session LIVE, before I die. So this is almost like a fulfilling a dream! (even though I havent watched wo cai in AGES! I only watched 1 wo cai over the last year, and it was when I was in Taipei in May! - yes yes Taipei AGAIN)

So I am looking forward to it!

But before that, I want to clear my struggles.

And hopefully, next year will be a brand new year - where I can start afresh!

I want to!

Someone super duper sweet gave me a trip to GBR for my birthday - so I will end the year with a bang ;-) I only did 2 dives this year, so can't wait for more!

Even more drama this week!

2011-11-19T17:20:00.002+08:00

BUT I really think it will be soon over.

Reality gave me a big tight slap on the face - when the person that I have been defending and trusting all these while (for YEARS!) is actually stealing from me, destroying me behind my back.

It came as such a shock. And it really woke me up.

It was a traumatizing experience. Words cant describe how I feel.

And at the same time, my friend got kind of paralyzed in Pattaya, my dad is in the hospi. And all sorts of these things - which I wouldnt repeat them again, as I have already ranted previously.

I can't help but feel that the gods are testing me - how tough I can be, what I am made of.

Anyway, I cut the person out completely within 24 hours of hearing the news. (hmm ha it was about 30hours, but 24 hours just sounds more dramatic!) Cleared all outstanding issues with him and severed ties.

Today I am sitting here, in shock of what happened.

Like a stone.

I did not get lots done today. But I did clear what I needed to clear.

And I cant help but feel proud of myself.

I can't believe I did it! And I can do it without that scumbag :(

And so, as much as I know that it was tough for me. And I broke down many times.

I know this is right for me. And I thank god for giving me this tight slap.

I am also very grateful and fortunate to see real kindness in the human race, and the love around me. Like E - who is a complete stranger, but gave me his trust. Like my dearest mom - who went with me for the confrontation. Like P, who was there supporting me at each and every step.

Gosh. Really.

I am a lucky girl :)

Bimbotic part: I think this is why I look young :) Yesterday dad's nurse thinks that I am 19! hahaha.. cheap thrill - I know! :)

Quite enough of Thai food - for now!

2011-11-15T00:33:00.002+08:00

I have this strange burning sensation in my belly - after a super spicy pad krapao for lunch and another spicy tom yam mad plao on for dinner.

I think I can no longer take any more thai food for now! I am pushing my belly to a limit - but thank gawd - I am almost coming to an end of my 3 weeks' stint in Thailand!

Sometimes I feel that I failed as a mentor. I cant seem to train up a double of me! :(

This is depressing.

And also what happens when your man is sooo low with EQ??

WHY all these dramas!

2011-11-13T17:31:00.002+08:00

Sometimes.. I am at a lost of how to face my life.

Sometimes I do feel like running away.

And it's not like there are no good things happening in my life. There are!

But things just kept happening!

*BREATHES!*

- Dad went into the hospital. Twice.

I wish I was back in sg - can't wait to get back!!

- My investments are in danger - with a financial house going bankrupt!!!

There is a buyout in the news -so FINGERS CROSSED!! I really did not think that I would be a victim of such a thing!! How can it be?!?!?!?

- Trying to train up someone - seems so much harder than before :'(

- Trying to leave someone who has been part of my life for so soo long.

Back to the good things!

- I stepped on to take onto my next role - and another step closer to my goal!! :)
- of course - with that, I get a nice raise ;)
- Being so so loved
- I think I am able to wrap up my VM project very VERY soon!!! Am so so close! I have had so much sleepless nights and white hair because of this. SO HAPPY!
- Bought and sold my very first property
- Bought a shophouse - with a higher passive income amount.

So I should be happy.

But why I am not... :((

Thoughts on a rainy day

2011-10-26T12:18:00.002+08:00

It is raining now - and I have lots of things to do.

I just feel that my brain is so cluttered!

I had a week's break. It was a good break from work.

But I guess, I dont really need a break from work! :P Yes yes - call me a workaholic!

I need a break. A clean break from the old baggages weighing me down.

So I guess it is a good break - to help me clear things out.

I promised the universe that I would contribute after 2 of my projects are sealed.

Now, I only have 1 project sealed. But I decided that I should contribute back to the society. So I made 2 loans out to Kiva.

Boy, am I surprised to see people from United States (san fran) requesting for loans. Like WTF???? Land of Abundance and all - why are you fighting for the loan $$ together with people who has REAL poverty to deal with - like in Peru, Mongolia, Vietnam etc.

Seriously! I have no sympathy nor tolerance for such people.

Fortune telling

2011-10-24T14:30:00.003+08:00

I just wanted to record my fortune - Yesh, I went for fortune telling!

In general I have wood, water and metal.

Career: To do something related to wood. Education + training is best.
If i want to be a GM - it has to be a leisure hotel.

Location/geo: East and North works for me

Investments: Both stocks and properties work for me. He prefers me to go into properties instead of stocks - just to be more stable
Can only invest/do anything during winter/autumn. No buying during summer.

VM: Can stay

Business luck/wealth luck: 32 years old, 38-42, 48-52

Colours: Green, black, white, dark blue, grey

Health: teeth, bone + women diseases

Marriage: winter 2012 or 2016

Sister: Cant participate with sister, but co-investing will work

People that will help me with my career: Tiger, Goat

People that I can work well with: Chicken

Improvements needed: to be flexible + humble

This person is supposed to be an expert, but somehow I cant quite communicate with him so ... oh well.

Gift of Gab

2011-10-24T12:59:00.002+08:00

Ok tomorrow - whether I make it through or break it...

It all boils down to my gift of gab.

FINGERS CROSSED! Please - everyone - FINGERS CROSSED for me.

I need all the blessings + luck and all for tomorrow.

THANK YOU UNIVERSE for the opportunity! :)

Roller coaster - list of upsets

2011-10-23T18:18:00.005+08:00

Sometimes.. life is really strange.

It gives you a hiiiiiigh going up - then it gives on a few downs.

Almost like the principle of trading. The little few downs - are like your "cut loss" trades. And the hiiiiigh is your big break.

I get so ARGH I guess - when I realized that I get less than the best deal out there. I feel like I am becoming...some of our ***** that we complain about :PPPP

OK!

Thoughts are random.

I am quite upset that I let my heart go soft when a woman whine at me. Like WTF!!! I am a freaking woman! And yet my knees go weak when some girl whines and acts cute with me. ARGH!! I am such a softie!!! This softness costed me 1.5K! argh

I am also unhappy that I got quoted a stupid high rate from my most trusted lawyer. I really liked Jenny. But alas - she actually quoted me 1K more than others. LIKE WTF again. Because I look like a pushover? Soft and fluffy - I feel that everyone wants to take advantage of me :( Why people :(

The next step for me - really doesnt seem like a big deal after all. Which is :( I dont think I will have a fat paycheck too. Which is a bummer. But well, it brings me closer to my goal! Think long term woman! :)

I am a little upset, because of my recent trade losses. But well, this is ok.

I am a little upset - that my Fendi spy bag has a little flaw already. I am getting it fixed next week! Together with my Dior cannege!

I am upset that I still havent settle my VM matters.

I am upset that I dont have a man to lean on in my life (physically I mean). Why cant I just settle for "in Singapore"? ARGH

I am upset that I mounted the kerb yesterday and scratched the car :"( (not sure how much it is going to cost...AGAIN :"() For that I am upset again that I dont have a man in my life here who can take charge of the wheel! I want to be a passenger! :)

OK thats all! Feeling better now :)

A big milestone!

2011-10-21T12:01:00.002+08:00

I freaking sold SV!

At a good price too ;-)

Am happy :)

Life is good :))))

Post birthday thoughts

2011-10-17T02:56:00.003+08:00

My birthday came and went - peacefully.

No cold sweats nor nervous breakdowns :)

It kind of sucks that I have to spend my birthday away from home all these years.

At the same time, I am kind of happy that I am in the states for my birthday. Well this only means that my birthday is eloooooongated. I start having birthday wishes from SG 12 midnight all the way to Eastern standard time 12 at night.

So it is pretty cool!

I really really do LOOOOOOVE my friends so much!!! What is life without them! :)

HUGSSS!!

I am pretty happy with where I stand now. (other than the fact that I blew a hole in my pocket yesterday SHOPPING! YES - US shopping is EVIL!!!!) ;-)

The universe works in a incredible way - and has since blessed me so much. That I somehow manage to hit all the goals that I have set up to achieve!

I am truly grateful for that!

It is almost impossible!! But true ;-) Though sometimes things that you wish for do not turn out exactly the way you think it would :p haha... hence, be careful what you are wishing for! ;-)

After hitting the goal that I have set out to achieve, I am going to change my perspective on this new phase of life.

I plan to sell either SV or BSH. Or both ;-)

Take the stocks trading part slowly and calmly.

Exit VM position.

And work on my work-life balance :)

Oh - I also look forward to my next career progression! :)

So many things happening. How can I not be excited ;-)

Life is so good! And I thank god soooo much for it!! :)

2am

2011-10-10T14:03:00.002+08:00

It is 2am now - and I cant freaking SLEEP!!! ARGH!

Help me.

I really dont think it is jetlag - as I am in Boston for about a week already!

H.E.L.P!!

I feel my mess falling into place - in the right way - slowly.

But I can't help feeling that I've missed something.

HMMMMM

What is it that I missed???

It is driving me nuts trying to figure that out!

HELP ME - somebody!

Breathing difficulties!

2011-10-05T11:54:00.002+08:00

All in anticipation of my 2 projects to close successfully!

ARGH!

Therefore cant breathe. They are both so close to closing!

And I am so so near to finance freedom.

So it is hard to not be anticipative, breathless, anxious!

Ok. I shall try to grab some sleep!

And I plege to contribute a part of my earnings to Kiva ;-) if it helps, dear universe! :)

Rescuing myself

2011-09-30T20:42:00.000+08:00

Today – in fact – recently, I am so swamped and stressed.

So for the past 2 hours, I did nothing. Nothing at all. Except for my favourite reruns of HIMYM and Suze Orman. : )

My life could have been very dandy and easy and breezy – but because I wanted a fabulous, exciting, interesting and unique life – I have accumulated so much crap in my life.

So I am trying very hard to crawl out of this. I guess I haven’t been pushing hard enough on this – and I have already been working so so hard.

And yesterday I broke down again. I am so so tired of doing everything alone. Being the “independent” girl. I am so tired of constantly being in a long distance relationship – because I never get the support that I need! :’( I think I cant. I am so so soooo tired. I just want to be married and happily settled down.

Argh – I hate marriage thoughts. I still remember the good old days that I have married thoughts whenever it is examination period! :P Yes yes – somehow strangely I seek solitude in marriage.

Strange huh.

Many many good things happened recently.

I feel that I am closer to finding my “the one”.
And entered in a commercial property – and I’ve officially hit my DREAM number! So I will stop now. I am happy with my cashflow.

However, my life is still in a mess – and needs to be fixed. Badly and urgently.
- VM
o **I need to settle the immediate issues of 5VM from 60SR
o Sell off van
o Sell off MVM – which are making my house look like a warehouse : (
o Sell off the other ones
- **Settle things with the bankers – to get the best loan

The 2 urgent things are with **.

I hate it that I will be away for 2 weeks in the States – which is so so far away :’( ARGH!

Ok I have 2 days more. Don’t give up!!! Grab hold of the chance! Ls is not giving up – neither should you!

Sincerity

2011-09-19T17:44:00.002+08:00

Yesterday..

I was so upset - with you.

Then I see how sincere you are... and that silly thing you did - in all sincerity and honesty...

I smiled and melted.

Because no matter what you do.. as long as you are sincere - I will forgive you in a heartbeat.

Writing

2011-09-10T09:06:00.000+08:00

They say: Writing is another tool to sharpen your mental saw.

I guess this is why I really do enjoy writing.

It is so therauptic.

I dont know why... I am feeling more and more uncomfortable about my love life.

Everything is going great. But yet the uneasiness lingers...

I searched within.

And wondered... is the problem - me - all along?

No wonder everyone else is able to have perfect relationships except myself.

The problem is me.

I have always been indecisive with relationships.

I want to change.

The current potential seems to be so so so perfect. The more perfect it is...the more afraid I am..

We have been spending so much time together.. we have been communicating so much.

When we are doing so, I feel this incredible sensation of sweetness...I felt warmth, and all the emotions I havent felt in a long long time...

However, at times, I find myself fighting for air...for space.

Now, what is wrong with me?!?!?

I dont want to feel this way!

I really dont know.

Then I start thinking of reasons why this relationship would not work. And all these thoughts are driving me crazy!

You are right. I need to be with a man whom I can respect and who I feel that I want to follow. It can never be the other way around.

I guess communication is still the key.

So now, how do I put all these stupid thoughts in a way that it is more digestable?

Another reason could be because I have yet let go of the past... Sigh..

Frowns!!!

MAKE UP YOUR MIND, WOMAN!
***********************************************************************************************
Here I am, approaching the yearly increment of my age.

I cant help thinking of getting something to reward myself.

At the same time, I am wondering if I really deserve it?

I should be investing the $$ instead?

Or we should see how much is left over from the shophouse purchase - if that is even possible at all! I really hope I get support from the bank! (On this note - I so need a raise - again - in order to get enough credit from the bank!)

If I manage to get that - it will be FABULOUS!!

Should I proceed to sell Simsville? - not sure - because all the hype about the development of Paya Lebar hub! Maybe I should just try to hit for a high number - then all will be great!

Everyone is predicting slowdown in the market in 2012/2013. Hmm.... Looks like I really need a crystal ball!

At the same time, I really do need to find a long term (at least 6 months out) solution for VM!!! Brainstorming time!!

Coming of age thoughts and such

2011-09-06T21:48:00.003+08:00

You might think that I am being a little bit of a drama queen.

By birthday is coming soon - and soon, I will be a ripe OLD age of XX.

With that, I really cant help, but feel so super nervous!

And hence I get distracted by what I really need to do.

Goals should still remain clear:
- My dream passive income per month (I will cut myself some slack here - and change this to dream TOTAL income) ;-)
I am thinking how do I get extra credit for this. hmmmmmmm...
- Exit my VM position: To plan better for it!! FOCUS****
- Work on a smooth transition for my new role :)

Prays to God. Please help me...

For I do want to do good.

Time wasting expert

2011-09-03T17:52:00.002+08:00

Woah.

I just realized that I have been clicking around for .....5 freaking hours!

Just clicking here, clicking there in the internet.

I am flabbergasted!!

I so need to focus.

One thing I have to admit - I am really enjoying surfing around! (Am a curious kitty cat ;-))

But there is one thing I have in my mind. And I want to reach my dream number... SO BADLY!!!!

But how? :'(

Surf more to get inspiration? ha!

Hmm. I think I'd better finish some solid work!

Exciting stuff!

2011-09-01T20:04:00.002+08:00

I am feeling so excited.

TOO excited - I cant even progress with my work - I am just sitting here, being excited!!

I am so hyper. I sometimes wish I could shoot myself with a tranquilizer! :P

Well, recently, it seems like my life is getting back into order.

- Career is going great and also going the right direction
- Love life .. seems to be seeing some light at the end of the tunnel ;-) (afraid to jinx it, but it is feeling more and more right by the day! smiles!)
- Balancing career and love - getting there! unbelieveable. not definite yet - but again very likely. So I am hopeful!
- Weight loss: ha i just need to sneak this bimbotic one in! Seems like losing weight is not as hard as it seems. I have some success so far. looking forward to shed another.... 5 kg ;-)
- Skin care: has been so far so good. face is doing good, but I need to still focus on pores. And! I am on my way to baby soft feet ;-) The thingy I used is working, and my feet feels softer than before! (well, not that I have hard feet to start well, but you know, I am obsessive, so yes, I strive for baby soft feet;-)) Why the sudden interest in my feet...hmm....well...to satisfy someone's fetish :P
- Weeds removal - moving along well (this is coded ;-))
- VM: managed to clear off quite a few. I know, it is at a loss - but it is an emotional gain for me, as I feel the relief emotionally!
Existing locations are money generally..oh well, I can better strategize 1 or 2.
- Family is as close as ever. Love them all!
- Love my friends too!! Managed to touch base with some friends that I have drifted apart this week. (again god bless whatsapp! ;-))

Life havent felt so right in the longest time!

I know there is still a lot to do and a lot to work and strive for. I still have a looong way to go!

But still!

I cant help feeling so so hyper right now!

Woots!

okie.

Nights! ;-)

Presidential elections!

2011-08-21T01:27:00.003+08:00

Ok.

I take everything I said earlier back!

after watching the exciting interesting conversations on TOC -> got to love TOC!

http://theonlinecitizen.com/2011/08/face-to-face-2-presidential-forum-video-part-1/

I have made up my mind - and I will cast my vote!

Make your vote count! ;-)

Thoughts detox

2011-08-20T20:45:00.003+08:00

There are a million things on my mind - ok a million is pushing it! ;-) Just some things.

So I am doing a detox now!

First and foremost...

Presidential elections:
I really dont see what the hype is, and all the publicity that is going on now for it. I am so so darn tired from listening and thinking - during the last General Elections.

We all know, the rights of the President is limited - so limited. So can the new President really make any impact? I think he can try - like our beloved Mr Ong. But no, at the end of the day, he still has his hands tied.

so what is the point??

I say: we should just have a contest - ala Miss Universe style! Who looks best on pictures? Who has the best handshake? Who can handle and hold babies best? Who cuts the ribbons in the most stylish way? ;) Thoughts? :P

Oh! Also very important - his wife - the first lady will also have to qualify for all the above "tests"!

Ha. ok enough of my crap.

In all seriousness. If the president has only MORAL obligations, not LEGAL obligations. Yes I think our president is grossly overpaid.

If we are paying the president so much - he has to have quantifiable duties and goals.

Thats my 2 cents' worth.

BTW I got a direct mailer from Dr Tan Cheng Bock.

I like him. But at the same time, I feel that it is a little freaky, how did he get my address + name?!?!

Big brother? ;)

Btw, I will be back from my Osaka business trip, will touch down at 16:40, so yes, what the heck, I will go to cast my vote!

**********************************************************

Ok next thought.

Well, today after was a little emotional.

I sold my very very first VM. Waved goodbye to it.

It is almost like marrying a daughter off.

I hope the new owner will love her as much as I did. - yes DID.

Sigh. It was a youthful mistake.

At the same time, I walked by my late grandfather's shop.

It was opened, and there were Real estate agents there.

I asked if I could take a quick look.

And went straight in.

The place was every bit what I remembered it to be... minus the medicines, minus the furniture,...minus my grandpa, and that familiar vibe there.

I saw the labellings of my grandpa's patient cards still there... I couldnt resist and took a picture.

And then.. the RE agent reprimanded me, and said no taking pictures.

For some unknown reason...my tears started flowing.

I didnt know the reason why.

But now I do.

I still miss my grandpa badly.

He has his flaws. But I still love him a lot.

It is heart wrenching to see his shop being taken down.

There are so much of my childhood memories there.

and now, they will be soon gone without a trace.

So yes. I teared.
************************************************
I have been thinking and pondering and thinking.

What my next step would be.

My boss has been pushing me for an answer.

This is really stressful!!

Argh!

**************************************************

Should I invest in that shophouse???

*************************************************
Stock investment project - Short or Long now?

Do you feel alive?

2011-08-13T18:57:00.003+08:00

So, I am back in my room - taking a rest after my stomping session in Hyderabad.

Castle was playing on TV - they were interrogating this lady who was in a loveless marriage and then she fell in love with this young aspiring actor/stripper - who made her feel alive.

Alive.

This should be how you should feel..when you are in love.

Suddenly, I have this "alive" feeling.

Not sure if it is really love itself..but it feels nice.

Make or break factors

2011-08-10T01:06:00.000+08:00

I just have some stuff to get off my chest, before I catch some sleep in time for tomorrow's meeting.

Make or break factors? - I am referring what makes or breaks a relationship.

Ok, I guess for today, I am really thinking about break factors.

I reflected and found my break factors changing as I grow..

I laugh when I think back on days where I dropped a guy because of the way he chew meat - he chewed funny!

Then I dropped men because of random reasons like he doesn't have business acumen etc.

Now, after years of dating...with bleak hopes of zooming down to the man of my life.. But I am still as lost as ever.

And the break factors I am facing with is so much more than before.

What if there's this someone who is so incredible, but he lives miles away?

What if he doesn't live by the same social guidelines? Or have different beliefs and is unwilling to compromise?

What if he is alcoholic?

What if he smokes?

What if he smokes weed?!????

I think I am going nuts.... I just can't.

God, please give me some sign. I am so lost..:(

This week

2011-07-22T23:01:00.003+08:00

This week is a emotionally draining week.

I feel myself experiencing some extreme emotions.

Different events happening one after another.

Need to be encrypt my post. As others are involved.

A very very dear friend....was given the death sentence. It was a mixture of helplessness and sadness...

Granny got into the hospital too. Seems to be fatal as well.

Met up with a super old friend for dinner + catch - happy that we did it!

Standing at cross roads for <3, not sure where to step to..

This makes me tired. :(

Well, I hope to spend some time with the dear friend + visit granny before I fly... before its too late.

OH! Just saw that uni friend - in the news. She is going to jail for stealing - again. ?!?!

Can I have more drama in my life please!

How to quantify a relationship

2011-07-11T19:32:00.002+08:00

Having long distance relationship experience under my belt...

I really dont think it is a good thing.

And most people tell me so.

SO.. no matter what happens.... DO NOT step into one.

NEVER.

Unless you have verified and have concluded that he is worth it! (I am still a believer!! :))

Great world - the movie

2011-07-10T21:26:00.001+08:00

I FINALLY managed to watch this movie!! After yearssss?? :p

This is one of the many things why I like plane rides (of course there are reasons why I hate plane rides too!) :)

I thought the story was really nice - so many things were so real...

Some afterthoughts..
- no matter how gorgeous a woman can be - all she needs is love. You can have all e affection from many men, but only 1 man will be the one who matters.(My heart broke together with Rose, played by xiangyun, when henry came. She has waited for him for 10 years!!! Respect!! Reminds me of my granny - I think she would do exactly e same. Wait, hasn't she? Anyway, moving on!!)

- what u have, at the last few years of ur life.. Will be memories. (Ponders to self - what memories are memories I want to have?)

- if you are old and alone - highly likely, u'll be grumpy ;)

- I wish I can be so fluent in so many dialects!! :p

- simple love is so sweet!

Ok, nights! Turning in here - in gold coast. XOXO

Any regrets?

2011-07-09T19:07:00.004+08:00

I came across this list of top 5 regrets people have on their deathbed.

I know this is morbid, and in the spirit of starting with the end in mind.

I really hope not to have regrets when I am laying on my deathbed. However, it is really hard to visualise what I could have regrets about..

Drawing inspiration from others' experiences...
1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
I think I do live a life true to myself. To a certain extent.. except in the love department I guess!
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
I wish that now! I wish I can have more freedom to do things that I really want. BUT I think I am most definitely working towards the right direction!:)
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
Hmm... I dont think that this is applicable for me...
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
I wish so too.. now. I need to put in more efforts in this department! Deal? DEAL!
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
I wish so too.. :)

It seems that what happened to the others, doesnt really apply to me.

One thing that I would really regret... is not to be able to have that one great love. Voila.

And again, I wouldnt want to make relationships mistakes again!!argh!

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html

**********************************************************
This is bad being around convertibles lately!

I WANT a convertible too!!

Well, sissy already have a convertible for some time now.

Yesterday F drove me with her mini-cooper convertible. It was really cute! But I dont think I am a mini cooper person ;-)

Today, S brought me out on his Audi convertible for breakfast. Very cool looking!

Argh! I want my convertible now! :P

***********************************************************
As I have started my trading activities - I will be tracking it as below! I know the blog name doesnt even really make sense - but this is because.. I wanted to first track more bimbotic things like my skincare adventure ;)

But now, I thought I needed a venue to track my trading journey. AND I am too lazy to create a new bloggie :))

So far, in GREEN! :)

http://thebeautyobsession.blogspot.com/

Mid year goal alignment

2011-07-01T22:09:00.004+08:00

I see some of my friends looking at their new year resolutions and how they have progressed - and this sparked me to do so as well! Progresses are in italic.

Finances
- sell off the rest of VM: well, believe me, I am working very very hard on this! Almost all my weekend is burnt. Or all my spare time on this! Got some results though! ;-) 2 Mech and 2 Comp sold! :))) but more to go. Please god bless me on this!! Yes this is really my main focus now!
- gotten a raise.. Nothing further to be done here. heh.
- got some ideas to explore
- got loan approved for my next property - which I will want to take my own sweet time to look=> But now I am not going to pursue this. After speaking to a very savvy property person (well, he own hotels and other big sized properties, am so grateful to have my good network of friends! :)))), NZ properties dont seem to be a good idea.. hmmm
- my own hotel - in progress! Looking forward to next expedition. To be honest - not very sure about this!

Ok, I started on my semi-pro (*COUGH****) stocks trading activities. First 2 trades ended in a cut loss situation, and current 2 positions in green ;-) ALL with the return of the longines! :)))

Aiming to exit my RE position in August ;-)

Health
- Play more tennis: sadly havent done so, BUT found tennis buddies! Isnt this a progress already? ;-) Started playing tennis - but with all of my buddies and myself travelling so much, I've only played once.. :'( But more to come!
- Pick up golf!! finished 5 lessons - my coach said my swing is pretty solid, but needs practice ;-) I must say - I really REALLY enjoy the game! I found myself tuning into golf champanionship on TV, while working - which in the past, I would never EVER imagine I might be entertained by this! Shocking! Got my golf done and in my poche ;-) LOVE IT! need to practise more though
- Swim more often! And on a regular basis. I will be bringing my swim wear along when I travel. Not doing it often yet but I did swim in Bali - This I will do. Still trying too!! Not very successful. Swam once this week though
I am starting to watch my diet recently. Have to. :'(

Oh diet watching has been successful. Am sure I've lost some weight :))

Love

What love? Still trying to find my way around... Made a terrible mistake, will never do it again!

Family
So far so good! Want to try to tempt some family members to join me for my trips... hmmm. Sadly they are not easily tricked ;-)
A-OK

Friends

Need to reconnect with some of my good friends that were distanced because of my travelling and being away..

Oh well, I am still super close with the ones I am close with since.. more than 12 years ago - so I think I am good. Just my uni friends.. sigh.

Sama sama. Too busy fixing my finances!

Pampering myself

I do want to buy myself:
- Loewe amazona bag
- Lady Dior bag
- Chanel 2.55
And maybe another balenciaga ;-)

Well, someone has pampered me with the Loewe bag. :) How lucky am I!

Got the Loewe as a gift, but nothing is for free in this world.. Oh! Got a gorgeous Lady Dior cannage bag ;-) Can't resist!!

I really hope things will get better. I honestly dont know any one who tries harder than I do... But maybe I just dont know enough people.

OK - actually I do know people who works harder - *knocks head*. Mr Forbes of course, and Markie Mark.

I think that is all! OK

Now I am signing off - got an event to go to ;-)

Return of the Longines!

2011-06-28T22:06:00.003+08:00

I got my watchie watch back - after some days of lost and found.

Looking at my watch this almost feels like the end of the string of unfortunateness in my life recently - in June.

For those of you who dont know... I have been really unlucky, especially with health and money recently.

Somehow some thing or another, will cause me my health or wealth.

BUT no more anymore! Now that I have my watch back!

Last week was such a ride - full day meetings and gala dinners every night! Old people like me - just cant catch up!! :P

One regret from Bangkok is - I DID NOT GET TO PARTY - as in to dance it out!

I am not an alcohol person, but I really want to dance it out - dance out all my trouble, my stress, dance like there is no tomorrow.

Oh well - Bangkok - I will be back again ;-)

Just my luck!

2011-06-18T23:11:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, I think that I am unbelieveably lucky. Sometimes, I think that I am so so so unlucky.

I wonder if it is really just a state of mind? Rather than the events that really happen?

Well. The recent wave of bad luck aside.

Yes I really think it is a state of mind. :)

Like today, I feel incredibly lucky! I had a super duper busy day - stressful too! But you know? EVERYTHING I need - really EVERYTHING I need is just within reach!

And only god knows all the strange things I need! WD14, adhesive remover, black shiny spray paint, etc etc etc!

So yes - I am lucky!

Thank god for all the blessings!! :))))

Thank you for blessing me! I will do my best to be a better and kinder person! :)

Health and fengshui?

2011-06-17T18:19:00.003+08:00

Haven't been in the best of health recently.

I haven't been in such a bad state since... well, as long as I can remember!

All the recent things happening 1 after another - makes me wonder... there is some fengshui problem that needs to be rectified. ( actually I am quite sure! :P)

So starting taking concrete steps to clearing my stuff.

Hopefully by Aug (or Sept - giving myself leeway ;-)) I get to be brand new again!! :))

Years of spring cleaning with all the crap that I do - is UNBELIEVEABLE!!

Charts and stuff

2011-06-17T00:30:00.001+08:00

Some after thoughts.

After starting on my trading journey for about 3 weeks already, I have to say - charts are soooooo BORING!!!

Emotions need to be contained. I almost started on gambling again! - was tempted to short some stocks. But I managed to exercise self control! :)

Need to persevere.

Will need to set time aside to scan through stocks again this weekend! ;)

Ok, I know, it is going to be boring charts time!

Technical trading is boring and hard work!

Hope it pays off! :)

Nights! Xxx

Worst year ever

2011-06-12T21:50:00.001+08:00

Things are just going bad - from bad to worse.

I am never really a wet blanket, nor a pessimist.

But honestly.

This is the worst year ever.

Time management vs Priority management

2011-06-10T21:46:00.002+08:00

Today, someone told me - there is no such thing as time management. It is more like priority management. I completely agree.

I have been not too well recently. Well for some time, then bad. Then today I thought I was feeling quite well, but after being in freezing airconditioning for the day, I am not feeling too good now. :'(

We all have a limited 24 hours worth of time - how do you plan and allocate your time?

There are an unlimited number of things to do, unlimited number of interesting people to meet. What about rest?

Like today, I am so tired. I wasnt able to really sleep yesterday - some back issue. ANW. Yet I chose to get up early to have breakfast with sissy - cos I havent seen my sister for the longest time! even if we are based in the same country?!?! how ridiculous is that!

Then I had to go for something that my dad has ordered me to go. Yes yes. I felt that my time was so wasted! But good thing is that I am near family.

But now, I am tired + sick. And I had 3 different places I want to be at, 3 different people I want to meet! What should I choose?

My body broke. And I dragged myself back home.

Feeling that I am getting better in an non-air conditioned environment.

But tomorrow and the next day again - is about the thing that my father wants me to do. :'( SIGH!!!!!!

I wish my father would do more homework before he places big sums of money here and there (ok big sum is big to me, but probably small to other people!)

Argh. :'(

So I think I am now health first. BUT again... father's orders before health. AND xxxxx before health too - because.... I have no choice. :'(

Sigh. Need to be an adult!

Action plan - Finance: Revised 080511

2011-04-23T19:28:00.006+08:00

I just wanted to update this - some good progress since! :)

*********************************************************************************
This post will keep on being revised! :)

Life is a constant improvement!

*********************************************************************************
Before I start, I want to thank god (again, I must clarify that I am not a christian!), for giving me so so many inspirations recently. And also to surround me with financially sound people :)

I am really really grateful for these - and I will treasure all these!! I promise!

I first thought that my goal was unattainable (ok - this is my revised goal, as I have already achieved my good 'ld goal :))

But now, god has sent some angels and messages to me. Yes - people are skeptical on things, but you know, I want to believe that it works!

With this, here is my action plan:

- I now have a certain % of my investments in properties
- For the remaining, Ok, without telling the world how rich/poor I am - HAHA... I will divide my remaining invest-able assets into shares - HAHA. I know - I am crazy right? ;) HAHA.
- 48 J-shares into equities
- 70 J-shares into commodities
- 20 J-shares....into high dividend stocks.
- 10 J-shares: trading. Back to my old trade of buying + sell, which I did pretty well
as a juvenile. haha. ;)
- 2 J-shares into education! :)

I might shift some of the 30 J-shares from high dividend stocks to either commodities and equities, depending which one I grow more comfortable in.

So, YES, I am going for the equity thingy next weekend. Yes yes yes yes yes!

:)

And commodities activites are scheduled 30 May! :)

Actions update:
- ordered samples of the trading goods :)
- signed up for the education! due on 28 May.
- More action on VM - answering enquiries! cool.

Make a difference

2011-04-20T18:59:00.001+08:00

Someone sent me this story below. You can read it at your own leisure..

My thoughts on this is.... we only live once, and life is short.

Make a difference! We need more people to do that.

Life is too short to waste it while playing guitar and relaxing!

Just my 2 cents' worth.

Story:

A boat docked in a tiny Mexican fishing village.

A tourist complimented the local fishermen on the quality of their fish and asked how long it took them to catch them.

"Not very long." they answered in unison.

"Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?"

The fishermen explained that their small catches were sufficient to meet their needs and those of their families.

"But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

"We sleep late, fish a little, play with our children, and take siestas with our wives.

In the evenings, we go into the village to see our friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs.

We have a full life."

The tourist interrupted,

I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you!

You should start by fishing longer every day.

You can then sell the extra fish you catch.

With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat."

"And after that?"

"With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers.

Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can then negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant.

You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City , Los Angeles , or even New York City !

From there you can direct your huge new enterprise."

"How long would that take?"

"Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years." replied the tourist.

"And after that?"

"Afterwards? Well my friend, that's when it gets really interesting, "

answered the tourist, laughing. "When your business gets really big, you can start buying and selling stocks and make millions!"

"Millions? Really? And after that?" asked the fishermen.

"After that you'll be able to retire,

live in a tiny village near the coast,

sleep late, play with your children,

catch a few fish, take a siesta with your wife and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends."

"With all due respect sir, but that's exactly what we are doing now. So what's the point wasting twenty-five years?" asked the Mexicans.

And the moral of this story is:

Know where you're going in life....

you may already be there!!

Elections

2011-04-17T22:45:00.003+08:00

The general elections are coming soon.

I dont know why.. but there is a sudden fear in me.

I am not usually afraid of change - well, you see that I am changing my country/city of residence ever so often.

But it really does seem to be scary this time.

Both ways seem so uncertain. I love my country - so I worry..

BUT I still think that this GE is still a positive one! Whatever the result would be... the voice of the people gets louder and louder. We are no longer - you know - "bochap" nonchalant.

I wonder what will the voice of the people say? :)

Do you deserve THAT bag? :)

2011-04-13T23:34:00.004+08:00

Recently - I get oddly drawn to bags...

Many many maaaaaaanyyyy bags!

Givenchy Pandora.

Dior Cannage.

Hermes Birkin.

Fendi Spy.

Proenza Schouler PS1.

Even Louis Vuitton neverfull!

I know. I know. I am acting totally girly.

And I see many many girls lusting after expensive bags too!

I wonder how many times do girls stop and ask themselves - do you deserve the bag that you are drooling at/carrying?

When or how do you determine if you are indeed worthy of your bag?

Maybe this is a question for Suze Orman? ;-)

For sure I know, I am not worthy of the Birkin!

Maybe the formula should be:
10% of (Total assets less 6 months' emergency funds less liabilities) ?

Or maybe....

It should be 50% of (NET monthly passive income).

Wow - this means... a Birkin say 15k USD, I need a passive income of 30KUSD to deserve it. Hmmm...

Ok. I know, I think I am just talking geeky nonsense now.

ARGH. Gawd - I am such a geek! :)

Nothingness

2011-04-12T22:13:00.003+08:00

Having been blogging as much as I wanted to.

Which is not good.

This means that I havent got much time/taken the time to sit down and ponder about... you know.. life in general.

I've spent Sunday - doing nothing. After a super eventful Saturday, I really needed a rest! On Saturday, I went to panjiayuan, after which to sanlitun, and to jinxuan market, THEN to 798, after which we had dinner at da dong (AMAZING pekin duck btw), and back to the hotel, dropped off my stuff. And it is off for a niceeeeee massage ;-)

Saturday was AWESOMENESS! :)

Anyway, back to nothingness.

I feel quite unenergetic recently.

And I think this is because I am no longer driven towards a goal.

Or there is nothing I want to get so so badly?

Or my goals are not defined enough?

I badly need my energy back!! :(

My 2 immediate aims need to be:
- Completing VM successfully!
- Start out something of my own :)

And May - get another asset. :)

Working harder for my beautiful future!!

On a separate note...
Recently.. I just have this strange feeling that I will be alone for the rest of my life. The search for my life companion... is indeed daunting. It is so difficult... Where are you? My soulmate. Can you please come and pick me up please.:(

This feeling is not good.

-------------------------------------------------------------------
Anw, to recap on my points from my new year resolutions! Progresses are in italic.

Finances
- sell off the rest of VM: on going
- gotten a raise.. somewhat
- got some ideas to explore
- got loan approved for my next property - which I will want to take my own sweet time to look
- my own hotel - in progress! Looking forward to next expedition.

Health
- Play more tennis: sadly havent done so, BUT found tennis buddies! Isnt this a progress already? ;-)
- Pick up golf!! finished 5 lessons - my coach said my swing is pretty solid, but needs practice ;-) I must say - I really REALLY enjoy the game! I found myself tuning into golf champanionship on TV, while working - which in the past, I would never EVER imagine I might be entertained by this! Shocking!
- Swim more often! And on a regular basis. I will be bringing my swim wear along when I travel. Not doing it often yet but I did swim in Bali - This I will do.
I am starting to watch my diet recently. Have to. :'(

Love

What love?

Family
So far so good! Want to try to tempt some family members to join me for my trips... hmmm. Sadly they are not easily tricked ;-)

Friends

Need to reconnect with some of my good friends that were distanced because of my travelling and being away..

Oh well, I am still super close with the ones I am close with since.. more than 12 years ago - so I think I am good. Just my uni friends.. sigh.

Pampering myself

I do want to buy myself:
- Loewe amazona bag
- Lady Dior bag
- Chanel 2.55
And maybe another balenciaga ;-)

Well, someone has pampered me with the Loewe bag. :) How lucky am I!

Recently I am in love with the Proenza Schouler PS1. TELL ME - if bags are not evil, I dont know what is! ;-)

Ok.

To bed - early day again tomorrow!

XOXO

What do I want for 2011?

2011-01-02T10:02:00.004+08:00

I always thought it is a good idea to write down my goals, so that I know where to steer my boat ;-)

I want to:
Finances
Some time back, I was scrapping by each and every day.

Years have gone past, I finally gotten hang of my finances. I dont know how to express this feeling in words. It was really hard.. but I have gone through that.

And so, really happy about it!

Right now, my aim for 2011 is to sell off the rest of VM :)

Also I got my 1st property and consistent passive income :))))

I remembered when I was a young little girl - I have a dream income number.

While, actually I have met the number, but my little aim has increased (not too ambitious) - I need 3K more per month now :)

How do I get there? hmmm.. internet company? ;-)

Well, at the same time, of course, I hope to get a pay raise. :)

Anyway, this is the direction that I am going! :)

Could there be more smileys? Ha. After this aim is achieved, I will retire!

heh. ahh.. sweet retirement.

Of course, keeping in mind my little dream of having my own hotel! :)

Health

- Play more tennis
- Pick up golf!! Already decided on my golf instructor!
- Swim more often! And on a regular basis. I will be bringing my swim wear along when I travel.

Now, I travel too much and when I travel, I don't exercise. So now, I need to plan to exercise EVEN THOUGH I travel.

hmm... will walking around a foreign city count as exercise? ;-)

Love

I think I am moving towards wanting to settle down.

So I do want to settle down in 2011. If I cant settle down properly with my current job, I would sacrifice my career a little.

But again, maybe I dont need to do so ;-)

Looking forward to a fabulous fabulous career - cos I can see it coming :)

Family
Family wise - is pretty ok. Spending a lot of time with family :)

Friends

Need to reconnect with some of my good friends that were distanced because of my travelling and being away..

Pampering myself

I do want to buy myself:
- Loewe amazona bag
- Lady Dior bag
- Chanel 2.55
And maybe another balenciaga ;-)

Drools!

So far, this year is quite a good one. Quite happy about it!:)))

My 2010

2010-12-30T20:26:00.013+08:00

I wanted so much to set time aside to think.

But now, am still sitting in my office on the night of 30 Dec.

I know if I do not do it now, I would never get about doing it.

2010 has been quite a ride for me. An eye opener most definitely... here goes:

The year started with a fabulous NYE countdown in the Maldives - where else? ;-) As we party through the new years :)))

Got my diving license :)

Went camel riding in Morocco.

Sissy + Alan came down to visit in the Maldives - and we went to play together. Oh we did catamarin sailing! :)

I bid my favourite people and place - the MALDIVES! And headed back to Singapore for a different challenge.

Started my very crazy travelling job

Starting from March this year, I did=>
- Kota Kinabalu (did 2 dives there!! :))
- Los Angeles
- Boston
- Braintree
- New York
- Toronto
- DC
- Phoenix
- Xiamen
- Kuala Lumpur
- Sanya
- Langkawi
- Kyoto
- Miami
- Fort Lauderdale
- Sydney
- Beijing
- Bali
- Bandung
- Jakarta
- Hanoi
- Paris
- Bordeaux
- Brussels

A couple of these places - I went multiple times. I traveled more than half the time!

Saw Obama!! Is this something to remember? ;-)

Being home for friends' birthday celebrations is awesome as always!

Got to know an inspiring F.

Close shave with world cup - thanks to S

Picked up tennis again! Played as often as I could - which is not very often, as I am hardly in SG :'(

Played on the green for my very first time (in scottsdale), and fell in love with golf - wanting to pick it up seriously! But that would be a 2011 goal ;-)

Bought my very first apartment!

Got my apart rented out - first step towards passive income! :)

A silly bit -> got high score in word mole! quite proud ;-)

From my previous lusts and desires, I already laid my paws on this lovely longines watch! I got a lovely pencil case too. And a kindle ;) And lovely dresses!

How cool is life? :)

I lost Tristan (my itouch) and got Tristan junior (my inano). Both are given with love - by different friends :)

Caught Bon Jovi in concert! Coolness!

Realised that I <3 Koalas!

Am home for Christmas!

Became a proud Krisflyer gold member. after flying my butt off!

Realised while I am extremely talented in racing (HAHA - no humility), I am useless in clay pigeon shooting . :'(

Permed my hair

Some really happy weddings- Sissy's wedding! Unfortunately I do not have the pictures. But it was a gorgeous wedding! And I was sissy's MC. Jancy's wedding, Weini's wedding. Very happy for them! Ri, Geraldine, Greg and Helene's wedding too!

Little Lizhe is born.

Lianshu + Chenwei, my besties got engaged! And we were treated to lovely fireworks on the yatch.

My birthday celebration this year kicks last year's ass! :) (given that I dont have high standards.. :p)

My very adorable colleagues did this =>

With family.

Already solved more than 50% of my VM :)))) what a milestone! :) More to go!

I seem to suck at handling/dealing with people who has low self esteem. So I need to improve on that.

Moving forward - what do I want for my 2011? ;-) next post!

Where did all the time go????

2010-12-26T20:06:00.003+08:00

I started this weekend - aspiring to complete many many things!

And now, I am at the near end of the weekend - but I have achieved nothing!

crap! :'(

Woe is I.

Urgent things to do:
- hosting stuff for VM
- Reply to chris for VM
- Basically clear all VM stuff

I hope to take the next week realigning myself for the new year too.

I know I havent written anything in sometime.

But this also means that I barely have the time to reflect on things that happened, things that i did etc.

I realised that I havent recapped 2009. And now, it is already end of 2010 - time really flies! too too fast for me.

I enjoyed those sessions... writing is so therauptic..

But now, I dont get the time anymore :'(

Just feel like sleeping already!

I HEART F1!!!

2010-09-24T15:13:00.000+08:00

But probably for the wrong reasons.. :P

Seriously - what is so fun about people driving cars? We have people driving cars around Singapore all the time!

Anyhoooo - I get to work from home! and that is da bomb! :)))

Time flies since I last set my goals.

With my birthday round the corner - what is the best place to reflect on my goals than in my hotel suite, hence is a luxurious 6 * property ;-) (wouldnt be too specific of course!)

But true to its excellence in service - I did not even need to stand in line for the immigration queue! There is a hotel staff who takes my passport and get it stamped for me - and also! Someone who helps me get my lugguage from the baggage claim etc. If this is not perfection, I really dont know what is! :))))

And I am ever grateful to have this experience... Travelling is after all - all about experiences. It is the experiences that we remember most!

I refer to my goals setting back in May 2009:
- I move on - AGAIN! :))
- I dont have a big collection of BCBG & Marc Jacobs dresses. But I do have quite a decent collection of dresses which I am quite happy with. So that is that! (though I am eyeing an anna sui dress and a couple of DVF dresses ;-))
- A lovely work bag: I got it! :)) And I LOVE it! though again very tempted by the Mulberry Alexa bag right now :P
- A cute laptop is already old news
- Oh - since Tristan lost his way in Toronto... Someone sweety sweet got me Tristan junior = and Tristan junior has been my travelling buddy eversince - we are inseparable! :) (for those who dont know, Tristan junior is my ipod nano)
- I had my lasik done :)
- I had the all sorts of organizers in my bag already - my bag weighs like it is filled with rocks! maybe my triceps will be building up soon :P
- 1/2 of my vm project is done :)))) the other half is almost done so - *fingers crossed & toes crossed!*
-my very own penthouse apartment: got my own apart for investment - havent had one just for my own consumption. But still! YAY!! :))

I still have pending in my wish list:
- the other 1/2 of my vm project
-A doting husband.
-A fluffy friend
-My cutesy convertible
-1 more step up for my career.

Up above all - my long term dream is to own and run + own my very little charming hotel. So it is in my plans to expand my empire. Right now I only have 1 property, I will be looking out to see where are the investment possibilities - for a small little fish like me! :))

So... so far so good! PS: though my current materialistic aim is to get a fabulous watch! And a pencil case. heh. i know.. frivilous!

Toast to my new fabulous life :)))

Thoughts diahorrea

2010-08-22T22:08:00.002+08:00

This weekend marks some big milestone for me..

Well - a little step for Jan, a big step for mankind ;-)

Ha. okie okie. Cutting to the crap.

Everything seems to be rolling well along. Too well - so I thank my lucky stars.

(Just got a little set up, but no problemsy! will iron it out with my lawyers tomorrow :)) Mum will be helping me do that, am in Hanoi now) Sigh.... thank god for my MUM! :)))

I got my keys on Fri (20 Aug)!! And got an ideal offer on Sat (21 Aug!)!

Should be finalising the LOI today - buuut.. got that minor hiccup.

Got to deal with the lawyers first thing tomorrow!

PS: Also.. I always have great people around me... whenever I really need someone to depend on.. God somewhat always knows what I need - who I need. So he arranges somehow magically the person to be there for me.

Really really thankful!!

And blessed. :)))

I couldnt have made it through this crazy and eventfull weekend - without this special person S. Thanks sweetie pie. :)

Occupied

2010-08-07T20:43:00.003+08:00

The only thing that is occupying my brain now is......

My apart!

20 August is going to be the day.. *think star wars' theme song playing now *

I cant think about anything else!!!! :'(

Help!!!

I need to focus on other things! :(

Lotsa things piling up! :((((((((

On the other hand....

I am still figuring out the other life priority of mine.. that - is still in a mess! :(

====================================================

I should so quit Word mole

New high score - 12253

Ranking in the world - 3017!

WHAT UP!!!!! :)

Isn't it Legen........ wait for it!... DARY! :)

Refocussing

2010-08-01T13:46:00.001+08:00

Recently, I am out of focus... which is not good.

It is not that I am not focussing on anything.

It is just that I am focussing on the wrong things.. :P heh.

What I have been focussing on... hmmmmm...

Mostly on improving my highscore for this boring game in my BB - wordmole.

HEH..

Well if anything, right now, my score is at 8137 - ranked 7000+ in the world.

I think I should really retire. haha..

So this is me. I get addicted to games easily :'( boohoohoo..

Alrighty.

So I have been spending quite a bit of time on this word game =.=

Hence I am here again, repainting my canvass.

My real focus right now should be:

- Selling the rest of my VMs :) Too many requests right now, I have to work harder in replying and closing the deals.

====> main focus

- Finishing the deal by 20 Aug

=> so far, investments sold and cleared to complete the deal

- actually quite interested in other investments if possible :) But I'd better not look until 20 Aug ;-)

So there, here's my priority now.

And of course, my other soft goals are again:

- A Longines watch ;-)

- To get my own home with my love

- a nice ring.. heh.

Arighty. Going to rest now and will be back to set my work on track! :)))

Hugs!

And I forgot

2010-08-01T10:58:00.001+08:00

- Watering cans

- Unicorns

- Ice cream cones

- Donuts!

ha. I think I am done. For now :P

Things that I get mysteriously attracted to

2010-08-01T10:57:00.001+08:00

Yesterday, we went around the town - where I am now, in Xiamen.

And I was pleasantly surprised that out of all the usuals that you find in msot other China cities..

You can also find very nice antique shops with clean, refreshing themes. :)

I was stuck in a shop yesterday, and I got a little handmade strawberry dangler. AND a little pumpkin one!

After spending quite a lot of time in that shop - and mildly irritating my colleagues...:P

I discovered that there are a list of things I am always attracted to. I wasnt really conscious about this before! But now I see the pattern=>

I get mysteriously attracted to......

- STRAWBERRYS!

- Pumpkins

- Tinkerbell

- Rabbits

- Bambi

- Owls

- Fish

- Pretzels

- the Peace sign

- Wings

- Stars

- Cherries

- Apples

- Bananas

- Merry-go-rounds

- Bird cages

- White vintage garden chairs

- Fountains

Oh man.

I wonder if there is a link between all these things.. are they fragments from my childhood.

Or..??

L'avenir

2010-07-25T22:50:00.001+08:00

Being a super duper obsessive forward looking person...

I planned my timeline of my investments.

And I cant help feeling tempted... to buy a car.

BOO.. all of my closest gal friends have their husbands or boyfriend to shuttle them around.

As for me... I have no one to give me a ride.

Well, of course except those random men. No one consistent.

Can't help feeling miserable about this...

So I googled the 2 options that I am toying with.

A Kia Picanto or a Beetle Cabriolet.

....

And i decided.. yet again, against this.

I just dont spend enough time in sg to justify the spend! :)

Head RULEZ!! (just had to add the "z" to be funky! ha )

Life changes....

2010-07-18T16:28:00.002+08:00

I must say...

The past 1 month - there has been major life changing milestones for me.

Well, to be strict - the life changing bits started in March, since I moved back from the Maldives, and stepped into my current new role. (well, it is not so new now! :) )

On one hand, job changing is one thing. LIFE changing is another. Although my job is a big part of my life!

Well, so for life itself. I just signed today, a mortgage insurance.

Why a mortgage insurance? I am glad you've asked ;-) (I am more and more like Barney already. haha.. I admit that I am hopelessly addicted to How I met your mother!!! ONe up! )

I bought my very first property... all by myself.

I never thought the first property I buy would be all by myself. But it is.

And here I am, still freaked out about it. But also glad that I've done it.

I remembered the first day I've signed and paid the deposit. I couldnt sleep! And called poor Vera out. ha. THANKS Vera! ;))

It was the world cup match - some ghana vs ..hmm I can't remember already.

I have never spent so much in my life. This is truly the most expensive purchase I have made. =.=

And moving on from that, I am trying to revamp my insurance.

To increase that to a decent amount - and then, I am done. I think 10% of my earnings is going into insurance/savings. *shudders* ==> at this point, I shudder at the thought of growing old :'(

And I think it is addictive - properties.. I am already eye-ing another one. But I know very well, it would some time. I dont have that capability ... yet ;-)

OHHHHHH.... Love is good! :)

I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE Kyoto!

2010-07-09T20:41:00.004+08:00

For now.. I cant imagine loving anywhere more than I love Kyoto!

Am struggling with my broken Japanese (even calling it broken Japanese is a faaaaaaar stretch!) :P

But work went really well! And I had time to see the city! Wee!! :)

Also got the time to go for a ichigo ichiye tea ceremony - so happily! I learnt Chado for six months yearsssss ago, but I never imagine myself practising tea in the place of origin of chado!! How cool is that!! :))))) It reminds me how much I loved it! - hence bought some crap like the natsume, etc... heh..

It was really REALLY hard to control my spending!! Everything is sooooo cute here! So i can only say I did my best! :))))

PS: From this trip on, I shall stop being sour and down about the amount of travelling I need to do for my job. (was complaining that it was tiring) - Travelling is GREAT!!!! :))))))

XOXO hope you all have a great weekend! :)

Recent events of Happiness!

2010-06-20T11:59:00.006+08:00

Hello hello hello!

In a hyper mood today, although i had to wake up at 7:30!??! grrrr....

totally disregarded the alarm that i've set for myself. But thank god! I managed to wake up naturally :))))

So met up with cheemeng - my partner-in-crime, to discuss about our script for sissy's wedding.

I swear cheemeng is trying to "terkan" me - meeting at 8AM!?!??! on a sunday?!?!

Ok- moving on!!

On having the script on hand, I am really having butterflies in my tummy!! :P

Saturday
Also, yesterday was a fab night, with my JC classmates. Vic is performing, and a group of us went down to roomful of blues to support him!

and WOW - it was a great experience!!!! There are so many talented people there!! :)

Definitely a feast for my ears :) Oh, this reminds me that I went for the maragaya's concert during the Singapore Arts fest. It was an interesting experience!

Some boring facts - but interesting to your boring friend here (me!). Maragaya is a community of Singers who used to perform for Indian royalty. They are Muslims, but they are the only ones who worship Hindu goddesses. :) cool right?

OK, back to this.

So really impressed with Vic's performance.

And there are some really happy news too!

SM is preggies!!!! 7 freaking months pregnant! And it is a boy!! :))))

Weini is getting married end of this year :))) to my sis's friend. so funny! and cool! :)))

I think about my life... I wish it would progress another step forward. Maybe it has - already ;-)

I did something big recently.. will share again when it is finalised ;-)

Friday

I played tennis - and am really happy that I FINALLY am able to do a upper hand serve! :))))))

Really think I am getting better at this! :)

Have been playing nonsensical tennis for so long, and I finally took the step forward to be serious about it. ha.

Also had dinner - simple fare - with one of my godfathers :) We had punggol nasi lemak.

And again great news from his side. His 2nd son won some film award at Cannes :)

His elder son moved back from NYC. AND he is going to be grandpa, second time around! He already has a grandson, and now his daughter-in-law is preggies with a girl :)

So happy that everyone around is happy and well and doing FABS! :))))) Love this atmosphere/aura. :)

I feel so blessed!

A is coming soon! that's that. Hopefully things will be conclusive this time round.

Other than that.. am SO excited for sissy's wedding this Sat!

Hope i dont fumble! :)

*fingers crossed*

Will do my final fitting for my dress on Tues! :)

World cup

2010-06-11T17:51:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I have so much to blog - but... For the privacy of my company and the high profile people I hang out with. I can't :(

Met mr Squeal-in-joy, my dear old friend. He said that I should blog down e juicy bits of my life - that I would surely get lots of hits.

But.. Don't think I can do that. Maybe on an anonymous blog? ;-)

Well. Just got invited to join someone for world cup in south africa on tuesday. And I had to turn it down, as it was too last min - I have work all planned out :'(

If I knew 1 month in advance, I would have gone!!!

Free tickets (to almost all brazillian matches, as he is a brazil fan), accomodation + food sponsored. He - my close dear friends, u know- is not Mr Forbes. He is Mr Lawyer.

Sigh! Am such an idiot to turn it down :( :'(

Will deffo watch a world cup match before I die - PROMISE!!! :))))

Am still sore about this. And we haven't subscribed to world cup at home :'(

Weeeeeell. Will just look on e bright side - I get to save time. Soccer can be quite time consuming. :)

Xxxx

Regards, J

Fashion & Acts Against Children Trafficking

2010-06-06T21:32:00.004+08:00

I've attended this charity event last Thursday - it was held at the Singapore National Museum.

Glitzy people were there - all well dressed up. I wished I could doll up myself - cos someone gave me a very last minute notice.

But still, it was a beautiful night.

(minus point is that I find some people there... quite pretentious. :( Why the need for this?)

I got a gorgeous shirt as a gift, which was bidded on for me at the charity auction :)

Last friday was great too! FINALLY met up with my 2 buddies - Vera and Shifu. It is funny that they are such good friends now!! :))))))

And on Saturday, I meet my dearest Maldivian "Da-jie" - Haely! She really took care of me when I was in the Maldives. really love this fiesty lady! :)))))) She is now happily married and I am so happy for her!

Also, I managed to spend some time with the shirt-giver. And bumped into Wayne too!

I look forward to what this week has to offer! xxxxox

The best way to start everyday

2010-05-30T16:07:00.002+08:00

In my imagination... my future family life -

I would prepare delicious breakfasts for my husband dearest... everyday possible.

:)

I always start the day in a good mood, if I get good breakfast!

Salmon scramble from Coffee bean is another fabulous breakfast idea! Yummy and easy to make!

So here is another idea to add to my collection of breakfast ideas:

Had a good day today -

It is Chenwei's blog shop launching today, and we all went to give our support!!

As cheesy as it sounds.... we are really... BFFs!! Best friends forever!

I <3 my friends!!!

PS: i got myself a necklace.

Charlie's birthday :)

2010-05-29T21:55:00.003+08:00

Something to treasure for years to come...

My most adorable nearest and dearest friends!! :)

Cancer

2010-05-28T16:46:00.001+08:00

Cancer and all sorts of other illnesses... are so scary..

They lurk around silently under calm waters..

And strike when you least expect it to strike.

Be sure to get insured, my friends..

And do your health check ups regularly.

Xoxo

Regards, J

Fw: A peek into nyse

2010-05-21T09:29:00.002+08:00

Recently I got to know someone interesting - and it allowed me to have a peek into the life and dailies of a ceo/founder's life for a nyse listed company..

It is scarily demanding.. And very very dramatic.

I don't think I am able to lead a life like that - I would probably be so overwhelmed!

I am already currently on e verge of collapsing.. :'(

I feel so weak as compared to him.

On e other hand, the ceo of this other big company based here is not leading e same crazy life.. Hmmm

Anyway.. Just a small conclusion and reconfirmation that actually I prefer play e supporting role for my husband and let him fly and reach his potential :)

I felt useless, helpless and weak recently... Like an underperformer..

And thanks to all of you angels out there - my dear dear friends - that I am still standing here, ready to put in my best for my next test! - flying off on sunday again :)

Hugs!!! Xxxxx

Regards, J

Struggles

2010-05-08T19:25:00.001+08:00

I feel that I am struggling right now..

It is not a good feeling.

And it's for struggles that I am not sure if it is worth it to fight for..

But... Since I have chosen this battle.. (And signed my life away too!! :))

I will fight it. I will fight it to the very end..

And watch me emerge victorious!!

Argh.

Just had to do a pedi today to pamper myself. Sigh!! Exhausted!
Regards, J

Personality contest?

2010-04-13T07:36:00.004+08:00

I was hungry and was happily walking back from buying :
- apple crumble * 1
- Fruit salad * 1
- granola bar * 1
- strawberry milk * 2
- big bottle of fiji water * 1

TO MY DISMAY.... I bumped into my new big boss. =_= Plus 2 colleagues.

So now, I am here, in a state of shock. (our meetings start tomorrow!)

I should probably tell u what I was wearing.. I had obviously my bikini top (because I run out of underwear fast), under my long puffed sleeve top with my pyjamas-like black drawstring 3/4..... WAILS!!!!

I am appalled!

What is he going to think of me?!?!??! Nevermind that he gave me a hug.

ARGH.

Then I realised.. career building is almost like a personality contest! (remember what they always say in ANTM??? those skinny models make a good point!!! :-) )

Tonight, I am having dinner with him + my 2 colleages. I have to be sure to build back my credibility and character....sigh. got to be on top of the game!!! Dinner is supposed to be social, so it is a real test to my social skills. AND THEN, I will have to impress him with my work skills and intellect starting tomorrow!

THEN THEN.. wednesday is golfing day.. BIG BOO. I have never felt so disadvantaged. Especially when i only have flip flops and heels. So.... I had to buy some proper shoes. I hate this kind of pressure...

But again.. got to play the game, right? So I've decided to get golf lessons when I get back. THEN I will become one of the snotty golf players :))) hahaha..

It is hard now that I seem to be the only non golf player. pooofs. Cant we play tennis instead??? :'( (got to pickup tennis lessons too, speaking of which!)

Soo.. this is a turn of my "work personality".

I hate this game.. am still learning to play this well. I guess I am not doing badly now. But definitely I seek to improve!!!

PS: this is NOT the personal me. only the work me. :)

SO, I shall leave you peeps to.... This amazing cactus with.... strange *cough* body hair ;-)

haha.. ok, I am gross I know! (In Arizona == dessert land now! :))

Obsessed!!!

2010-04-12T02:38:00.003+08:00

I have work piling - personal and non-personal.

And all I can focus now, is to track my air miles! To see if I have sufficient to go to my planned vacation destination.

AND also to track down all of my missing mileages and hound the airlines for it... (although it was my fault ..heh)

Also!! to see how close I am, to the next membership tier!

Oh my gosh, these airline loyalty program people are really good no?

And so now.. I am a miles junkie! :'(

Lifestyle changing tots

2010-04-09T10:05:00.005+08:00

I am still up now.. and SOUTH PARK is on TV!!

How cool is it that South park is on TV??? ;-)
This episode is about facebook!! haha.. Yes, SP is THAT good. Stan got stuck in FB. Stan is hosting a chat party for all his friends, and they are all together - and their conversations are like the FB comments/live feeds. So funny!!!!

While I feel like I am spending too long in DC... heh.

Seeing how the people here in US make a conscious effort to be healthy again - recognising their weakness.. inspired me to think of some changes I want to make to my life.

Hereby are the new rules set for myself! ;-)
- I will only buy stuff that dont need ironing
- I will not bring things that I can live without for 3 days. (things i did not use at least every 3 days makes the cut!)
- I am going to eat healthy! - I will pack fruits and carrots and celery for snacking, so that I can snack healthily! (inspired by my colleague here. GOSH really, all my colleagues here look like models! The lady is 5"10-178cm. sign) The really yummy ones I have been having - I LOVE the food preparation here!! The hotel is just plain creative ;-):
* Watermelon with cheese
* apples
* bananas
* carrot sticks + dip
* celery sticks + dip
* natural nuts - almonds and stuff
* granola bars
* My fav cereals for brekkie : honey cornflakes/honeystars!/fruit loops/blueberry morning :)))
* anything with nutella. haha...
- I will exercise every morning!!!! ARGH hard.
- I will focus!!! ARGH i m supposed to work :'( but cant. argh..
- Pick up golf. argh. I have a golf game next Tuesday.. tell me how... --"
- Bring music wherever I go.. sigh.. need a replacement tristan.. :'''''( I want to focus on tots, and block out noises...

Well, that's all i can think of for now :)

XXXXOO

PS: SP is now having Tiger woods on TV! XBOX invented a tiger woods game, where you are the wife hitting Tiger with the golf club - and tiger drives the car out and hit the tree.. haha. And Stan used his pre-nup power up! :D

Understanding USA

2010-04-05T07:05:00.004+08:00

Today was a beautiful day in DC, and I've decided to visit the Museum of American history.

Just on level 3, I spent close to 4 hours..

There were many moments of the history, that almost brought me to tears.. I wonder if it is because I am getting old, hence I cry easier now? hmmm..

I always had the impression of USA - from SATC, britney spears and all the other pop icons. Carl's junior, McDonalds and all that come into play too.

But today, I found that... USA is not too different from us. They too, struggled from being a British colony, to independence. They too, had inter-racial issues, like us - although, of course, there are slight differences here and there. They have been through a tough civil war..and us, racial riots.

I think, the success of USA, comes from the unity of the people. It can be seen from what they have achieved as a nation during war time! Growing their own crops in their backyard and many other efforts made as a team. And also, their respect to their military people.. is commendable! I only wish we can give more respect towards our men who are serving in the army and our NS men.

All in all... I had a great time discovering American history and their political leaders. :)))

Of course, there were parts of the history, where I find.... unpleasant. like how they tried to colonize philiphines.. OH this reminds me, I was - of course- trying to spot singapore's name in the museum, and I DID! haah.. We were mentioned in the quote of Emilio - the philiphines general, who sought the US's help to fight the Spanish, and later needed to fight of the US.

ANW.

It was a very fulfilling day! :)

PS: I miss tristan.. :'(

Lost and found day

2010-04-03T09:33:00.005+08:00

Today is a roller coaster lost and found day! argh..

except that...

Dearest CW, LS, D, J.... I am soo sooo sorry. I am feeling so bad that I am not even stepping out this evening.

I've.. lost tristan :'((((((

This is so depressing. :'((((((((((((((

PS: Tristan is my itouch that my friends gave me for my last birthday.

I am really so so upset that I've lost it.

It has finally sank in that I've lost it.

In the fashionable and hip hotel that I am staying at now, party music is everywhere... it is hard to ignore, yet.. I am so so soooo depressed.

I hope it will find its way back to me again.. :'(

Strolled to see the lovely cherry blossoms today.

The scene is so romantic... I only wish that I have my loved ones with me... This is the down side of travelling for work - you are always alone.. :( (and on top of this, I was depressed because of losing tristan. anw.)

Even dogs come in pairs!! :))

There are couples, mum+daughter, friends, families.. I was like an outsider, taking in the happy and warm atmosphere.

When the wind blows, I was lost in pink petal snow. :)) I caught a petal on my hand, - like how sis always does - I made a wish.

A pink wish, every girl wants... hope it will come true ;-)

==================================================

It has been really tiring! As you know me, I have to - and MUST - see all the attractions/significant heritage sites of the places I visit. So, I work in the weekdays, and walked a lot A LOT during the weekends - did not feel that I have rested at all!

and I know, it is all my fault.

But I can't help myself!! :))))

XOXOOOO

The chicken wing therapy

2010-04-03T01:07:00.003+08:00

Today morning while packing, i realised that I cant find my favourite marc jacob pouch!!!

It was a precious gift from someone dear, and not to mention my USD bills in it.. and credit card and all those important stuff!

I cancelled my trip to Toronto downtown, and was flipping my suitcase for it. And also emailed SR to see if they have seen my pouch.

After 1 frentic hour, I got the news from SR - they ARE THAT fabulous!!! - that they have my pouch and will get it to me in DC by Monday! Whopppee!

I was jumping up and down for joy!

I still decided not to go down to Toronto anymore, as I was having a bad headache - my poor bell man, he was so kind! He got me a $10 discount on my cab ride - how cool are my colleagues in hospitality!!! - which I jumped in joy too when i heard it.

So I was so tramautized that I had to have therapy... so... I ordered a big plateful of honey glazed chicken wings with fries and diet pepsi. And indulged! while in bed (with my egyptian cotton sheets of course!:)) watching Anger management.

Life never felt so good!

Hence I am here, to give me thanks...

1 bad thing happened -> left my mj pouch in SR in NYC.

And the FABULOUS things that happened are:
- my fabulous bellman who painstakingly arranged my transport to see toronto downtown - and got me a great discount too!
- My fabulous concierge and housekeeper who found my dearest pouch!
- The beautiful weather!!!
- The yummy plate of chicken wings!! :))))

OKie dokes, I got to go! Big HUGSSSSS!!

XXXOOOOXX

Time difference sucks!

2010-03-31T09:04:00.002+08:00

Why oh WHY must the world have time differences????

It's getting on my nerves. I wonder how the world will be like, if there were only 1 unique world time?

My very first webinar - as in it is the first time that I am the main speaker! is in 1 hour.

Have to match asia pacific's time - as I am staying up ..

Ok, got to go through my presentation again. Why must it be 10 freaking am in Toronto :((

HUGS!

New York state of mind ..:)

2010-03-29T22:36:00.004+08:00

Hilarious but true, all the stereotypes about this NYC seems to be true!!!

ha. more on this later.

Heading out on Saturday to the swanky Meat packing district for dinner with my friends :))))

Big big hugs from the Big apple!

Heading to Toronto soon! :)

XOXOOOO

ANGRY!

2010-03-25T07:31:00.003+08:00

Just an angry rant! I have been trying to buy the ticket for Wicked this weekend for broad way.

And none of the websites take non-US/Canada credit cards.. ARGH!! So frustating - it is not the card number that is the problem, it is the billing address

SO ANGRY - what a waste of time - a good 1 hour!!!

ARGH.

I emailed them - hoping for some replies.

Else, I will just get more time to see New York city :)))

There is always ALWAYS a bright side to things! ;-)

Tribal Workers

2010-03-24T11:06:00.002+08:00

Got this article from sissy - from financial times. Found it quite interesting - especially for someone who has worked in 4 countries - and is now a professional nomad... :)

Is this me?

------------------------------------------------------------

Tribal Workers

Today's generation of high-earning professionals maintain that their personal fulfilment comes from their jobs and the hours they work. They should grow up, says Thomas Barlow.

Copyright The Financial Times Limited

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A friend of mine recently met a young American woman who was studying on a Rhodes Scholarship at Oxford. She already had two degrees from top US universities, had worked as a lawyer and as a social worker in the US, and somewhere along the way had acquired a black belt in kung fu. Now, however, her course at Oxford was coming to an end and she was thoroughly angst-ridden about what to do next.

Her problem was no ordinary one.

She couldn't decide whether she should make a lot of money as a corporate lawyer/management consultant, devote herself to charity work helping battered wives in disadvantaged Communities, or go to Hollywood to work as a stunt double in kung fu films. What most struck my friend was not the disparity of this woman's choices, but the earnestness and bad grace with which she ruminated on them. It was almost as though she begrudged her own talents, Opportunities and freedom - as though the world had treated her unkindly by forcing her to make such a hard choice.

Her case is symptomatic of our times. In recent years, there has grown up a culture of discontent among the highly educated young something that seems to flare up, especially, when people reach their late 20s and early 30s. It arises not from frustration caused by lack of opportunity, as may have been true in the past, but from an excess of possibilities.

Most theories of adult developmental psychology have a special category for those in their late 20s and early 30s.

Whereas the early to mid-20s are seen as a time to establish one's mode of living, the late 20s to early 30s are often considered a period of reappraisal. In a society where people marry and have children young, where financial burdens accumulate early, and where job markets are inflexible, such appraisals may not last long. But when people manage to remain free of financial or family burdens, and where the perceived opportunities for alternative careers are many, the reappraisal is likely to be strong.

Among no social group is this more true than the modern, International, professional elite: that tribe of young bankers, lawyers, consultants and managers for whom financial, familial, personal, corporate and (increasingly) national ties have become irrelevant. Often they grew up in one country, were educated in another, and are now working in a third.

They are independent, well paid, and enriched by experiences that many of their parents could only dream of. Yet, by their late 20s, many carry a sense of disappointment: that for all their opportunities, freedoms and achievements, life has not delivered quite what they had hoped. At the heart of this disillusionment lies a new attitude towards work.

The idea has grown up, in recent years, that work should not be just a means to an end a way to make money, support a family, or gain social prestige but should provide a rich and fulfilling experience in and of itself. Jobs are no longer just jobs; they are lifestyle options. Recruiters at financial companies, consultancies and law firms have promoted this conception of work. Job advertisements promise challenge, wide experiences, opportunities for travel and relentless personal development.

Michael is a 33-year-old management consultant who has bought into this vision of late-20th century work. Intelligent and well-educated - with three degrees, including a doctorate - he works in Munich, and has a "stable, long-distance relationship" with a woman living in California. He takes 140 flights a year and works an average of 80 hours a week. Some weeks he works more than 100 hours.

When asked if he likes his job, he will say: "I enjoy what I'm doing in terms of the intellectual challenges." Although he earns a lot, he doesn't spend much. He rents a small apartment, though he is rarely there, and has accumulated very few possessions. He justifies the long hours not in terms of wealth-acquisition, but solely as part of a "learning experience".

This attitude to work has several interesting implications, mostly to do with the shifting balance between work and non-work, employment and leisure. Because fulfilling and engrossing work - the sort that is thought to provide the most intense learning experience - often requires long hours or captivates the imagination for long periods of time, it is easy to slip into the idea that the converse is also true: that just by working long hours, one is also engaging in fulfilling and engrossing work. This leads to the popular fallacy that you can measure the value of your job (and, therefore, the amount you are learning from it) by the amount of time you spend on it. And, incidentally, when a premium is placed on learning rather than earning, people are particularly susceptible to this form of self-deceit.

Thus, whereas in the past, when people in their 20s or 30s spoke disparagingly about nine-to-five jobs it was invariably because they were seen as too routine, too unimaginative, or too bourgeois. Now, it is simply because they don't contain enough hours.

Young professionals have not suddenly developed a distaste for leisure, but they have solidly bought into the belief that a 45-hour week necessarily signifies an unfulfilling job. Jane, a 29-year-old corporate lawyer who works in the City of London, tells a story about working on a deal with another lawyer, a young man in his early 30s. At about 3am, he leant over the boardroom desk and said: "Isn't this great? This is when I really love my job." What most struck her about the remark was that the work was irrelevant (she says it was actually rather boring); her colleague simply liked the idea of working late. "It's as though he was validated, or making his life important by this," she says.

Unfortunately, when people can convince themselves that all they need do in order to lead fulfilled and happy lives is to work long hours, they can quickly start to lose reasons for their existence. As they start to think of their employment as a lifestyle, fulfilling and rewarding of itself - and in which the reward is proportional to hours worked - people rapidly begin to substitute work for other aspects of their lives.

Michael, the management consultant, is a good example of this phenomenon. He is prepared to trade (his word) not just goods and time for the experience afforded by his work, but also a substantial measure of commitment in his personal relationships. In a few months, he is being transferred to San Francisco, where he will move in with his girlfriend. But he's not sure that living the same house is actually going to change the amount of time he spends on his relationship. "Once I move over, my time involvement on my relationship will not change significantly. My job takes up most of my time and pretty much dominates what I do, when, where and how I do it," he says. Moreover, the reluctance to commit time to a relationship because they are learning so much, and having such an intense and fulfilling time at work is compounded, for some young professionals, by a reluctance to have a long-term relationship at all.

Today, by the time someone reaches 30, they could easily have had three or four jobs in as many different cities - which is not, as it is often portrayed, a function of an insecure global job-market, but of choice. Robert is 30 years old. He has three degrees and has worked on three continents. He is currently working for the United Nations in Geneva. For him, the most significant deterrent when deciding whether to enter into a relationship is the likely transient nature of the rest of his life. "What is the point in investing all this emotional energy and exposing myself in a relationship, if I am leaving in two months, or if I do not know what I am doing next year?" he says.

Such is the character of the modern, international professional, at least throughout his or her 20s. Spare time, goods and relationships, these are all willingly traded for the exigencies of work. Nothing is valued so highly as accumulated experience. Nothing is neglected so much as commitment. With this work ethic - or perhaps one should call it a "professional development ethic" - becoming so powerful, the globally mobile generation now in its late 20s and early 30s has garnered considerable professional success. At what point, though, does the experience-seeking end?

Kathryn is a successful American academic, 29, who bucked the trend of her generation: she recently turned her life round for someone else. She moved to the UK, specifically, to be with a man, a decision that she says few of her contemporaries understood. "We're not meant to say: 'I made this decision for this person. Today, you're meant to do things for yourself. If you're willing to make sacrifices for others - especially if you're a woman - that's seen as a kind of weakness. I wonder, though, is doing things for yourself really empowerment, or is liberty a kind of trap?" she says.

For many, it is a trap that is difficult to break out of, not least because they are so caught up in a culture of professional development. And spoilt for choice, some like the American Rhodes Scholar no doubt become paralysed by their opportunities, unable to do much else in their lives, because they are so determined not to let a single one of their chances slip. If that means minimal personal commitments well into their 30s, so be it. "Loneliness is better than boredom" is Jane's philosophy.

And, although she knows "a lot of professional single women who would give it all up if they met a rich man to marry", she remains far more concerned herself about finding fulfillment at work. "I am constantly questioning whether I am doing the right thing here," she says. "There's an eternal search for a more challenging and satisfying option, a better lifestyle. You always feel you're not doing the right thing always feel as if you should be striving for another goal," she says.

Jane, Michael, Robert and Kathryn grew up as part of a generation with fewer social constraints determining their futures than has been true for probably any other generation in history. They were taught at school that when they grew up they could "do anything", "be anything". It was an idea that was reinforced by popular culture, in films, books and television.

The notion that one can do anything is clearly liberating. But life without constraints has also proved a recipe for endless searching, endless questioning of aspirations. It has made this generation obsessed with self-development and determined, for as long as possible, to minimise personal commitments in order to maximise the options open to them. One might see this as a sign of extended adolescence.

Eventually, they will be forced to realise that living is as much about closing possibilities as it is about creating them.

Cherry blossoms!

2010-03-22T08:36:00.002+08:00

While I realised that it is already impossible to keep my blog updated with travel pictures - more so impossible now that I am travelling much more than before -.-"

Which is actually quite sad!

Anw, did not know that there are lovely cherry blossoms in LA!

And in Boston now - Miss geek visited Havard and MIT today ;-) Where else do you think I would go?? :)))

Next stop New York!

HUGS~

Confessions..

2010-03-13T19:55:00.003+08:00

I have a confession to make...

I have been wasting my time on personal leisure.. and I have not been as hard working as before.

I get angry with myself.

I did 2 great eye-opening dives here in KK .. and I have planned for a massage now, AND a date with the orang utans tomorrow.

WHERE is the workaholic who works everyday??? It must be the novelty of travelling - so so sooo many new things to see!! :)

And also, I have been looking to see what leisure stuff I can do in the states... ARGH.

Kill me now.

I need to set limits to my leisure time. To cap it to 0.5 day a week or 1 day max a week. And WORK WORK WORK!! Because I really need to. And I dont deserve so much play. yet.

I am not there yet! Remember?!?!?? argh.

Short walks..

2010-03-13T17:18:00.002+08:00

Ahh.. while sissy was walking the chic Raffles place... I am prowling the streets of Kota Kinabalu ;-)

While she is able to hold off a gorgeous agnes bag, I have been spending :((( and HOW? oh HOW?!?!??!

sigh.. things seem so "worth it" here that I blew off so much just in the crummy little mall beside the hotel!??!?!??! ARGH!

I guess I am fear-stroke - after all the wrinkle talk and crow feet chatter... I must admit, I am scared now ok?! I dont even have a face moisturiser - which I quickly got one.. etc etc.

Ok, I still dont have different things for the face and eyes and lips etc.. I guess. I am not scared enough OR I am just not rich enough!

These skin care stuff are expensive you know!?!?!? :'(

Getting old sucks.....:''''''(

On the plane

2010-03-09T18:49:00.001+08:00

On the plane again.

From KL to KK.

Suddenly I am consumed by thoughts again...

The year of a tiger has been great for me. I had a great conversation
with a good friend yesterday - someone that I would never thought that
I would be able to be friends with... Heh. I wonder if social status
etc still plays a part in today's society - obviously the answer is
yes, ok this is me digressing again :-)

Secretly I view this person as a mentor. Looking at this and the
amazing friends I have around me...

I feel so lucky. Really I do.

Hence.. I really want to thank god for this blessing- blessing me with
the most amazing friends and alliances. And hopefully more to come! ;-)

Isn't this strange for someone who used to think that I have enough
friends and I do not need any more friends? ;-) ah, those good old
secondary school times..some of you know me then;-) ha..i was such a
silly goose!

Also, I am very close to reaching one of my long term aims... Sooooo
close-only sissy knows. Great progress yesterday, and hopefully more
soon:-) - ok it's not a long term aim, rather an aim I had for a long
long time.

I am just tired that this is dragging on for so long and I am happy
that it is coming to some form of a happy ending :)

Hopefully this is to be concluded by 19march:-) pray for me k?:)

May the fortune god smile upon me. Huat ah!! ;-)

Am in such a happy mood today! Though I was in a bad mood just now,
having to cancel TWO appointments that I was looking so much forward
to, but did not have the chance to do so- all because I was standing
in line at the KL immigration with my heels and laptop! :-( sore feet!
(ok, I realize that I m complaining about this for the 2nd time.)

Ok, so still chirpy. I hope I get a good start for this first business
trip, marking the start of my new role. :)

I will definitely strive to be the best- will be observing and taking
notes to firm up my strategy to approach this role. Right now, I am
feeling very raw.

Big hugs!!! Are u all good??:)

The begin of my new journey..

2010-03-07T15:24:00.000+08:00

On my way to my new journey, and it did not start easy!

I just stood in line at the KLIA immigration, for 1 hour - with my heels and laptop => talk about hard labour... you guys dont know how punishing heels are! :'(

Cancelled my plans in KL city and decided to stay in the airport, and wait for my transit flight.

Hopefully everything goes well from here :))))

HUGS!

Oh, for those who dont know... I moved from the Maldives.. and am a professional nomad now ;-) Stay tuned for my first destination!

How is everyone? ;-)

Things done!

2010-02-21T21:04:00.001+08:00

Diving license - CHECKED!

eCornell course - CHECKED! :) :)

Why is it that I always manage to finish things that I set out to do ;-) I am SO LOVIN' it!!!!

So happy!!! :)

Did my final dive today and got my license :)))))

I saw a Honeycomb! :) and a baby shark and lobsterssss (yum!) and lionfishes and eels and stone fishes...

Growing up

2010-02-20T05:42:00.000+08:00

> I am suddenly overwhelmed by some very strange emotions...
>
> I remember a long time back.... I am the girl running for an excom
> position in my school's faculty club. I was so raw and not eloquent
> nor confident at all- in terms of presenting my ideas in front of a
> large group of people.
>
> There was someone.. Who asked the right questions, so as to give me
> the chance to shine... And I was thinking then... Wow... I really do
> appreciate and respect this move. Not fully sure that I managed to
> make full use of this opportunity created for me though:) I must
> admit that I took it negatively at first... :(
>
> And now... I am the one creating the opportunity, and I am really
> feeling first- really glad that I am in the position to create this
> opportunity for someone; second- really upset that he did not grab
> the chance AND took it negatively too :(
>
> Now... I wonder how many opportunities are created in the world,
> with so much efforts and kind intentions...how many of these
> opportunities are properly cherished and grabbed.. And how many of
> these opportunities are received negatively and thus everything fell
> in vain?

Sigh...

Well, from this, I must really remind myself that in every difficult
positon I am put in.. Lies an opportunity for me to shine. No
opportunities created for me will be ever in vain :))))

And you my dear friends shouldn't too!!;-)
>
> Best regards, J

Goals and such

2010-02-18T05:06:00.002+08:00

Am on vacation right now...

Yet. I dont feel like I have the time to rest and repose bien...

Suddenly, I feel tired.

Sometimes I dont think I know what I am fighting for...?

Ant And Grasshopper

2010-02-08T12:58:00.000+08:00

The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.
Come winter, the Ant is warm and well fed. The Grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

*Indian Version:**
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter. The Grasshopper thinks the Ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

NDTV, AAJTAK, CNBC, TIMES NOW ETC show up to provide pictures of the shivering Grasshopper next to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the Ant's house.*
Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers demanding that Grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter. Mayawati states this as `injustice' done on Minorities. Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.
The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the Grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support
as against the wrath of God for non-compliance) . Opposition MPs stage a walkout. Left parties call for ' Bengal Bandh' in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry. CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among Ants and Grasshoppers.

Mamta allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Duronto'. Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the ' Prevention of Terrorism against Grasshoppers Act' [POTAGA], with effect from the beginning of the winter. Arjun Singh makes 'Special Reservation ' for Grasshoppers in Educational Institutions & in Government Services. The Ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, it's home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the Grasshopper in an exclusive
ceremony covered by NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it ' A Triumph of Justice'. Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice '. CPM calls it the ' Revolutionary Resurgence of the Downtrodden '
Kofi Annan invites the Grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly. **

Many years later....**
The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollar company in Silicon Valley , 100s of Grasshoppers still die of starvation
despite much reservation everywhere in India , AND As a result of loosing lot of hard working Ants and feeding the grasshoppers, India is still a developing country.

My stressES right now

2010-02-05T23:27:00.004+08:00

are...
1. Diving license --- I cant be the loser Maldivian with no diving license!!!! ARGH
2. And this eCornell course I need to do.

gawd....

Side note:
Picture time!

We had a Bollywood night party and of course, we all wore our saris for the night. It was FUN! :)

(Sad that I only have 1 sari, but still! happy!)

Ok, and now back to mugging!! ARGH. life!

Bimbotic thoughts ;-)

2010-02-04T00:09:00.006+08:00

Bimbotic thoughts=>

I want to go for :
-my bi-weekly pedicure (pedicure is almost a must)
-clearing weeds
-hair: I definitely need a colour fix. But should I perm my hair? AND a hair treatment too. ;-)
-shoes! I need new shoes!! argh.
-Back clearing.
-To buy FAT clothes!!! argh again.
-I want a BB -> no matter whether it is from my co !! IR-regardless *hair flip!*

hmm.. that's all for now. And only some of the crazy people who know me well enough will know what I am talking about ;-)

Sick people

2010-02-03T02:56:00.000+08:00

> I am bothered so I really need to write to get it out of my system.
>
> I wonder why some people have to be so mean when they know that the
> victim has no fighting power? Or when e victim is nice towards
> them... Hmmmm
>
> These people just makes me sick! :@
>
> Best regards, J

Decision making

2010-01-25T03:21:00.000+08:00

Some food for thought from my bossie...

A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use while the other disused. Only one child played on the disused track, the rest on the operational track.

The train is coming, and you are just beside the track interchange. You can make the train change its course to the disused track and save most of the kids. However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track would be sacrificed. Or would you rather let the train go its way?

Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make........ .........

Most people might choose to divert the course of the train, and sacrifice only one child. You might think the same way, I guess.. Exactly, I thought the same way initially because to save most of the children at the expense of only one child was rational decision most people would make, morally and emotionally. But, have you ever thought that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact made the right decision to play at a safe place?

Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who chose to play where the danger was. This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday. In the office, community, in politics and especially in a democratic society, the minority is often sacrificed for the interest of the majority, no matter how foolish or ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the minority are. The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was sidelined. And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for him.

The great critic Leo Velski Julian who told the story said he would not try to change the course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the operational track should have known very well that track was still in use, and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens. If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that track was not in use probably because it was not safe. If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all passengers on board at stake! And in your attempt to save a few kids by sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to save these few kids.

While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to be made, we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the right one.

What do you think?

A New Era

2010-01-19T00:31:00.003+08:00

Am taking my next BIG step, ladies and gentlemen!

I was freaking out all weekend about this. I couldn't understand my fear myself.... It was to the point that I cant sleep.

Well, I felt better after I wrote and planned everything again.

But what I feel now.. is thankfulness.. I can't help feeling so blessed and lucky. ;-)

Thank you God/Universe for being so great to me, and for taking care of me so well...:)

I just wished for it on 5th Jan, and it is happening now :)

Who says magic isn't real? :))))))

My new purchases

2010-01-10T23:31:00.005+08:00

I am in such a great mood today, that I went around shopping!!

Here are some of my loot!

And a little pouch for my cammy.

And a uVision, for my eyes ;-)

And my long awaited uCrown.... again by my sweetie. :))

AND my long lost diary came back to me again - now it is still in USA, but it will soon but in my hands soon..;-)

I feel so LUCKY!!! 6.6.6.6.6. ;-)

I already have my perfect city bag!

And (too many "and"s) more work clothes and shoes, and I will be ALL SET! ;-)

...:)))))

Life is so good! Thank god for all!! :))))))

Priorities

2010-01-05T02:07:00.002+08:00

By Q2, I want to....
- fix vm
- move on to the next step of my plan

and these 2 are my priorities. I need to remember these.

:)

Tres Maldives

2009-12-27T12:03:00.006+08:00

A lazy Maldivian day

Maldivian sun and sea :)

Maldivian skies..

A bat during the day!

I WUV my friends!!!! :))))

2009-12-20T14:08:00.010+08:00

My birthday came and went..

And I had the BEST birthday ever ;-) Seriously!! :)

Part ONE:

PS: i am loving my biggest brain on FB:

Bits of my life

2009-12-20T14:08:00.008+08:00

Cruising (November)

breakfast today :)

What's at the bottom? ;-) Look closely and you will see a lobster ;-)

Fishing trip! (5months back - gosh, how I proscratinate! With my favourite boat captain)

Grrrr

2009-12-08T00:22:00.001+08:00

how many times do i need to get slapped on my face, before I can face up to the REALITY.

You need to get out! Yes YOU!